March 2007 Trip to Tennessee

On March 2 - 4, 2007, Tut, Johnnie and I took a business/pleasure trip to Tennessee. For a musicologist, such as myself, it was a very heartwarming experience. On Friday, Tut and I left his house at 7:00 in the morning. We headed to Johnny's house to pick him up. He lives south of Valley Springs. Our itinerary was Memphis and Nashville, Tennessee.

"Memphis, home of the blues, birthplace of Rock & Roll." That is the city's slogan. Our first stop in Memphis was the Gibson factory. Gibson has 3 factories. One in Memphis, Tennessee; one in Nashville, Tennessee; and one in Montana. Seeing the Gibson plant was pretty interesting, seeing how the Les Pauls and ES-335s were made. They make everything at Gibson hand made. There are no production lines at Gibson. It helps keep the idea of quality made. 4 out of every 100 guitars do end up getting "axed" though, but that's not too bad. They destroy the ones that don't make it to Gibson standards because Gibson doesn't sell 2nd quality instruments.

After we left Gibson, we drove to 926 E. McLemore, off of McLemore and College. Does anyone know what stood here once in music history? A show of hands? Soulsville, USA once was here. Yes, folks. Stax Records. Stax Records was owned by Jim STewart and Estelle AXton. Have you figured out where the name STAX Records came from yet? It had to be torn down though back in the late 1990s, and when they rebuilt it, it became a museum. Within this 10 mile radius of the city lived several really well known musicians in the 1960s and they all recorded there. All of them being white and black proving that music knows no colors. Music knows no race. That really hit me hard! It really made me teary eyed. Another thing that touched me was the control room and studio part of the museum. Where the studio part of the museum is at is the same exact spot where the original studio stood. This is where Booker T. & the MGs (Memphis Group), Otis Redding, Sam & Dave, Sam Cooke, among others have all recorded. Everything in the studio area was rebuilt to look exactly like the original, except for the "burn holes in the carpet." The control room area even had the original equipment used and even the original master tapes. They were saved after rioting broke out in 1968 when Martin Luther King was assassinated outside his hotel room at Lorraine Motel which is also in Memphis. It is now known as the Civil Rights Museum.

It is really very sad what happens to places because of what people can do. After Martin Luther King was killed, rioting broke out in every major city in America, including Memphis and the cities never really did recover. It really made black folks hate white folks, which made Stax fall under because at Stax white and black people got along together well, and that didn't happen anymore after King's assassination. And when Otis Redding was killed at the young age of 26, a year shy to be in the 27 club*, around the same time, the company just folded. Isaac Hayes and a few other soul kats tried to keep it going, but because of the assassination in 1968, Stax never really returned to its old ways. After a few years of struggling, the company folded. In 1974 the building got boarded up, and over the years it started getting run down. It had stayed that way for 30 years. In the late 1990s, the city of Memphis realized how historical the building was and tried to remodel and renovate it without much success so they tore it down and rebuilt it in the original location. If King wasn't shot, Stax would still be going strong today. All of America's ghettos probably wouldn't be as run down as they are now, also.

On Saturday, we went to Daniel Brom's repair shop in Fairview, Tennessee. Fairview happens to be a suburb of music city. Nashville, Tennessee. He is supposed to be the greatest guitar luthier ever. It was really awesome to see what he does with restoring guitars to get them to the original look. After spending 2 hours at his shop, we went to downtown Nashville where Gruhn Guitars is located. Gruhn Guitars is the most famous vintage guitar shop in the country, if not the world. It now sits where a place called Buckley Records once was. George Gruhn used to have his business 2 stores up before his business boomed in the early 1990s. Tut apparently has 30 or so guitars on consignment there, 10 or so on the lower level that everyone can see and 15 or so on the 2nd level. The 2nd level is where "special clientele" gets to go shop. Vince Gill was on the 2nd floor a couple months ago filming something for New Years on PBS. He picked up one of Tut's guitars and started playing it and said he really liked this guitar and that he was too poor so maybe Amy (his wife) can get it for him. After that film was shown on PBS, there was so much interest in that guitar that Tut thought it finally was going to sell, but it never did.

After we left Gruhn Guitars, we went to the Ryman Auditorium. That is where the Grand Ole Opry used to be back in the 1940s – 1960s before it moved to its present location at Opryland in 1974. The auditorium almost got demolished, but instead it got put on the national historic registry. I am glad for that! We got to stand on the actual stage and have our pictures taken. It was really such a tear jerker! I mean, Johnny Cash had once stood here on this very stage!

After leaving Ryman, Johnny and I were allowed to walk Broadway to see all the different clubs and stores. We passed about 7 different clubs, each one playing some kind of live music. There were even some street performers. I had Johnny tip one of them.

One of the clubs we passed was Tootsies. This club is pretty famous in its own right because during the days of the Grand Ole Opry, the players would hang out there and knock back some brewskis before heading across the alley to the stage door entrance of the Ryman. By the way, the Everly Brothers were discovered at the stage door entrance to the Ryman.

After we left Downtown Nashville, we drove to Opryland, USA. That is where the Grand Ole Opry is now. When we got there, they were obviously preparing for that night's Grand Ole Opry show. There were people moving stuff, and trucks all over by the stage area. While driving through, we noticed about 7 or 8 satellite dishes. My guess is those are so the show can be broadcast nationwide. We saw the Gibson factory there too, which was pretty cool. It is located in the Opryland Mall. The factory is also a Gibson store where you can buy Gibson merchandise like Guitars, Mandolins, and shirts, etc.

On Sunday, we woke up at 7:30 and had breakfast because we wanted to get on the road and head back home at a decent hour. We did have a long way home ahead of us.

We got on the road at 9:00, and were back in Memphis at noon. We saw Graceland first. For $30 you get the mansion tour, Elvis' car museum, costume museum, his airplanes, and a museum that showed how he had fun. To see it all really takes 4 or more hours, and it's very exhausting. They even have numerous gift shops to browse, an arcade and a couple of dining spots.

To the side of the mansion is where Elvis is buried. For years I thought he was buried behind the house, but it's actually on the right side of the house. His mother, grandmother and dad are buried right next to him. There is an eternal flame burning for him at his gravesite. It is such a real tear jerker. Makes you really shiver and really puts a lump in your throat. On the mansion tour they don't allow you to go on the 2nd floor of the house because that was his most sacred place, so when he passed away in 1977 and it became a museum, Lisa Marie made sure no one would go up in respect for her father.

On the walls outside of the gates to the house people have left their marking. The other museums at Graceland are short ones, but are still very interesting. The car museum shows every single car Elvis had owned. It included even his famous pink Cadillac that was his mother's favorite car. He even had a cool looking 1973 Ferrari Dino and a 1966 Rolls Royce.

After that we saw his planes. He owned 2; the Lisa Marie is his most famous one. It was originally a plane for the Delta Airlines but when he bought it in the early 1970s; he had it remodeled to suit his standards. There is a bed, dining table, etc. in it. Lisa Marie even celebrated her birthday one year on it with her dad. Since it was his favorite jet out of the 2, he named it after his only child "Lisa Marie." When the pilot would radio in to the control towers, he would say that "Hound Dog 1" was about to land. That was the Lisa Marie's code name.

The costume museum houses all his different costumes he wore on his shows. The after dark museum showed us how he basically liked to have fun. Apparently, Elvis was an insomniac only getting about 4-5 hours of sleep. This would explain his addiction to sleeping pills.

The whole Graceland experience really takes the energy out of you. Makes you really not want to do anything more. It makes you feel really "Elvis'd Out."

After we left Graceland, we drove to 706 Union Avenue. This is where Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Elvis Presley, and Jerry Lee Lewis had the famous Million Dollar Quartet jam session and where the most famous picture in Rock & Roll history was taken, which was during the famous jam session. The very first rock song, Rocket 88, was recorded here in the late 1940s. After Sam Phillips quit running his studio there in the late 1950s, it closed down. It became a scuba shop for a few years. When it was a scuba shop, they had plywood on the walls, which was easy to take off so you can see the original tile. Everything at the studio is original down to the neon sign in the window that says "Memphis Recording Studio." The only thing not original is the "Sun" sign at the top of the building. And will stay that way for the rest of time because it is now on the national historic registry. It is the only recording studio still used today that is on the national historic registry. The entrance to the museum isn't through the original entrance to the studio though. It is the entrance to the place next door which was a diner in the days that Sun Records made history. When it was turned into a museum, you enter through the door where the diner was located. They even had the original recording equipment. They wanted everything to remain as it was 50 years ago! They even had the original microphone Jerry Lee Lewis, Elvis, and Carl Perkins, etc. had to lay down their vocals thru. The piano that Jerry Lee played on "Great Balls of Fire" is also there. A real tear jerker!! Very historical!

After leaving there, we drove by the famous WDIA building where WDIA had its radio station. This is the radio station that played Elvis' cut of "That's All Right" for 3 hours. After he cut it, Sam Phillips took the record to his friend DJ Dewey Phillips (no relation). Giving Elvis his first 1, making him a star. It is still in operation today. It's a news/talk station on the AM dial. AM was all you can get back in those days. There was no FM or XM. After getting a couple pictures, and dealing with some idiot in a wheelchair fussing that a cop had to stop, we got onto I40, to head back home.

You know, this area of the country really is the perfect place for music history to happen, and it couldn't have happened at a better time. You got the Mississippi Delta in the south, which includes Clarksdale, Mississippi. There was a lot of culture down here where a lot of black folks, who were back in the late 1800s finally freed from slavery, were playing their music, and inventing the blues and even jazz in New Orleans. And than you got the people in the backwoods of Tennessee and Kentucky who invented their hillbilly music, better known as Bluegrass or country. People headed north for a better life. Ending up in Memphis or Nashville, or even as far as Chicago, where the famous Chess label once stood. All this happening right after the radio was invented. And with all the music, and culture happening in this 300 or so mile radius, people wanted to be heard and people wanted to get them heard. Radio and the recording industry were still in its infancy. There was no mistake or coincidence that music history happened here in this location of America. And because of what people done in the first half of the 1900s in this part of the country musically, people travel from all over to come to Nashville and Memphis for music history of all sorts and to hear music of all sorts.

It was really neat. We had an amazing trip, and it was very exciting. I wish I would've had more time because there is just so much to see. You really have to plan a week vacation to visit Memphis and Nashville. I also realized on this trip that I really need to start getting involved in keeping music history alive, and the music itself alive. Either by donating money to help renovate the historical buildings that were involved, or something of that sort. I have even thought about starting my own foundation that raises money to save and renovate such buildings, or pays money to save instruments that the numerous well known players have played, etc. This trip was very heartfelt, and it really touched my heart and soul, and now it's time to sit down and listen to some Elvis, Johnny Cash, Bob Dylan, BB King, Otis Redding, Booker T, and go to sleep.

		March 2007 Trip to Tennessee VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

The Mike Irvan Music Foundation

this is a music foundation I am hoping to get started. Read further for my foundation's mission statement. If you would like to help me out getting this foundation started or if you have some ideas on what to name this foundation please let me know.

OUR MISSION AND OUR GOAL:
Our goal is to bring music and music history awareness to everyone. We also raise money for music education programs and for those who want to attend music schools. We also raise money for music history trips. You tell us where you want to go that involves history of music and we map out your trip and will pay for your tickets. If you ever wanted to visit famous blues sites in Clarksdale, Mississippi, or even famous sites in Nashville and Memphis, but didn't know where to start we can help you plan your trip and book your tickets for the famous sites.

We also raise money for people to attend things like rock and roll fantasy camps (which occur every once in a while) and we will even supply you a couple tickets to your concert of choice, and if you have to travel to see that concert we will find you a good hotel so you can enjoy the music and not have to worry about driving. We would even fly you there if necessary.

We also raise money to save, repair and remodel any buildings that were involved in music history. If the building had to be tore down for any particular reason we would make sure that the land it was on got something in memory and honor of that building's history, or even get a museum put there, but we will do whatever it takes to save any building involved in music history. Those buildings don't need to be demolished, they are historical landmarks. We also make sure such buildings get placed on the national historic registry. We need to make sure that such buildings as the Capitol Records building in Hollywood, California; the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville; and Sun Records, among others, will never get demolished.

And of course, our main goal is to bring music history and awareness to the younger generations so that very talented musicians, songwriters, and producers can never be forgotten. If it's related to music or saving music this foundation will cover it.

Time To Start A Revolution!

In the 1700s our forefathers were sick of British rule and British taxes and so began the Revolutionary War which we would go on to win. Than in the 1960s you had kids who didn't agree with the war in Vietnam and you had blacks who were sick and tired of not having rights and being treated like dirt in their own country. Everybody just felt like the government, and authority (let alone anyone over the age of 30!) were to be trusted. They wanted to make a change, and they did. A lot of people I've heard say that they didn't make any change, but think about it: in 1964 the civil rights act was passed due to the civil rights movement, and even though it took a lot of time and protests, in 1973? (I am not sure exactly which year) the Vietnam War ended, making it the longest running war in American history. We also won our Revolutionary War in 1776, making us a country that's free from British rule. If that's not making a change, than I don't know what is.

Where are these kinds of people at these days? As much as people complain about how the world is, they are never willing to do what it takes to change things. They feel as if they can't make a difference, but the thing is, if they can't make a difference and nothing is going to change than how come the incidents of the 1700s and 1960s prove differently? Those two eras have proven that if you get a good amount of people together who agree on something, you can make a difference. You can make a change. Everybody these days however are too afraid. And if they aren't afraid, they are selfish people who only care about themselves, and not everyone else. They are afraid they may lose their jobs, or even go to jail. They would much rather keep their mouths shut instead of sticking it to the man, but I say, "Who cares?" who gives a shit what the man is going to do? Yes, agreed I keep my mouth shut too but if I don't have enough people to back me up that's what I'll get myself, jail time or fired, but we have got to do something, folks. Our country depends on it, and we need to do something now.

Folks, I am 28 years old and I am sick and I am tired. For starters, I'm sick of paying taxes. Why are we paying taxes for to begin with when our country was founded on anti British taxes? Why are we paying taxes all year round from our paychecks and yet pay again at the end of every year in April? Last year I had to fork out $600 in April on taxes. $600 I DID NOT have! I claim 0 on my W4, and haven't had to pay since I've claimed 0 until last year – when I started working 2 jobs to make ends meet! If it weren't for the stupid taxes, I'd actually have enough money from just 1 job! Everything is taxed, and if you can't pay your taxes in April you're charged a penalty fee. If I can afford $600 to pay my taxes in April, I'd have my credit cards paid off and enough money in the bank for a rainy day! I understand that some taxes go to a good cause, but here is what I feel should be done instead to get that money: first of all, taxes coming out of our paychecks could be left as is, but whatever is paid to the government from our checks is all they'll get from our checks. No more "tax time" in April. No more worrying about how much you're going to owe in taxes in April, because it's paid for through your paychecks they get enough from us throughout the year, they don't need more. Second, every working American should pay $100 a year to the government. Think about how many Americans work in this country. If every one of us just paid the government $100 a year, they would have the money needed to pay for whatever taxes pay for, and this would erase the need to figure out how to pay $600 - $1000 each year in taxes when you don't have it. I can figure up $100 easily without screwing my bank account status over, I can't figure up $600. I never have that much in the bank. As it is, Americans go deeper and deeper in debt because of credit. We buy everything on credit anymore because we never can buy it with money. Why not? Because we never have money because of taxes, therefore we go deep into debt – when you get something paid off, you have something else you owe money on! I won't have enough money in my bank account because of bills (and taxes) that if I need to buy food I have to put it on a credit card – in order to not starve to death because I'm not lucky enough to get food stamps. The government "thinks" I make too much, yet alcoholics and drug addicts will get enough food stamps for a month! I have seen people in the check out lane who pay for $50 - $100 in food stamps, and than go on to buy $100 worth of liquor, yet somebody like me who has to work 2 jobs to survive, and pays their taxes can't get the food stamps (yet part of those taxes that I pay goes towards food stamps).

Another thing is gas prices. If it's not taxes making you broke its gas prices, and when you got the two combined you have no other choice to pay for things but with credit because all the money you have will either go to taxes at the end of the year or into the gas tank. It costs about $40 to fill up a 15 gallon gas tank, these days – yet wages aren't going up (but I heard if you are only paid minimum wage your wage went up, but the rest of us haven't seen that raise) and prices of things aren't going down.

Another thing I'm getting sick of seeing, its stupidity and ignorance. Folks, if you are in the store and you're looking to check out – look up at the register signs. If the light is on, they're open; if it's turned off they're closed. If they have the closed sign out, they're closed, and if they have something blocking their register they're closed. Don't waste that cashier's time or yours by asking them if they're open or not. If you would just open your eyes once in a while you can figure it out yourself. Just because that cashier is standing at the register still and his light is off doesn't mean he's open. If his light is off and he doesn't motion you to come over to his lane, he's closed, get over it!

When you're in a parking lot looking for a parking space, look before you turn otherwise you might run into somebody. I can't tell you the number of times I almost got run into and the carts I was pushing almost ran into some idiot's car because they didn't look at all before they turned.

Another thing I'm sick and tired of hearing is stupid ignorant questions. If you're just trying to make small talk that's fine – but make legitimate small talk. Don't ask a person if they have a dog if they're buying dog food. That's a little too obvious; instead ask them about their dog. And don't ask a person if they like bologna or salami sandwiches if they're buying it. Why the hell else are they buying it? And if you go to a colder climate (and its winter time) don't complain or comment about how cold it is! Duh, it's to be expected. Now, if it got colder out that's fine to mention. Or if it started snowing, or raining that's ok too, it's called a weather update. But don't ever act like you weren't expecting it because it's to be expected and if you're traveling don't say something like "wow, it snows here" or "I didn't know there were ice storms here". It's a rule of thumb that when you're traveling CHECK THE WEATHER before you go.

And over the holidays, mainly Christmas, don't expect to find stores open late on Christmas Eve or expect to find any stores open at all on Christmas. Christmas is the only day where 95% of your businesses are closed, get over it. It's always been this way and always will be this way, don't act like that you never knew this. I can go on and on.

I'm also sick and tired of corporation America (mainly the stores). I worked for Wal-Mart for four years. I used to like Wal-Mart until I worked for them. They have an open door policy there where, as they claim, if you have any problems you can talk to their manager and they'll help you. What it translates into is, "there's the door. If you don't like it, you can leave." – However if you treat them like they're your best friend they'll do whatever it takes to help you out. I'll give you an example (and this is what led to my termination from crap-mart) I was outside pushing carts for a little over a year, it got to a point where I was getting burnt out and they got me so mad that a customer asked me how I was doing (and I'm not one to lie to people) and I told that customer how I felt. The co-manager got wind of this, and told me instead of putting me elsewhere he was going to put me on carts for another 6 months in hopes that my attitude would change. I told him how I felt, but he didn't care. What kind of tactic is this? Obviously an employee is getting tired, put him elsewhere. That is what I would've done. But no changes were done and it just got worse, over the next month 2 more customers asked me how I was, and again (twice more) – not being a liar (which I have never been) – I told them how I felt, and next thing I knew "there was the door". Some open door policy. Yeh, maybe I should've kept my mouth shut but when he heard that I was getting burnt out, he should've put me in a different position in the store. He should've worked with me instead of acting like a jack-ass over the situation so my termination could've been prevented if he would've worked with me like he would have with the 'butt kissers'.

Another thing I'm getting sick of seeing is corporation America treating holidays, especially Christmas, like a gimmick to make more money. Christmas is not about making money; it's about giving and mainly the birth of Christ. We should all spend one year and skip Christmas and see how the corporations feel than. I am sick and tired of seeing these kids in the store at Christmas time (let alone any other time in the year) with attitudes of "I want, I want, I want, gimme, gimme, gimme" – this is what Christmas seems to mean to people anymore. It's not about buying things and getting things. It's about bonding, family values, the birth of Christ, togetherness, being with loved ones. It's not about buying things and getting things at all. Giving a needy person or family a hot meal and warm clothes, maybe. Christmas has always been about giving to those who are less fortunate, which is a good thing. Help those people out, and raise your kids to have the same values to want to help them out, but don't ever raise them to have that "I want, gimme" attitude.

And lastly, I'm sick and tired of rude, bossy, and inconsiderate people. I understand your boss, supervisor, manager, whatever you want to call them is going to tell you to do things, but they better be nice about it and know how to say please and thank you. I've worked for people who look at me like I'm stupid or ignorant just because I didn't do a project for them right away (or at all) – chances are I might have not heard them for one thing, or was working on another project and not going to drop one thing just to start on another. There's a manager at the store who is a very fast talker and is very rude. He reminds me of a car salesmen, and he apparently asked me the other day (over the PA) to sack for someone on register 4. I mainly didn't hear this, and when I looked around at register 4 I saw only 10 items on that register. When that manager walked by me he gave me this look, and had a bad attitude when he said to me, "do you not sack for people when you're cashiering?" and my answer to him was that I come off my register to sack when there is 20 items or more to sack, because on 10 items the cashier usually can sack it." – Usually if there's 10 items, it's pointless to sack for that person because it's already sacked by the time I get there. And on another day, there were only 8 carts outside, that same manager said "go push carts". There was no "please" – it was an order. Who does this guy think he is? Where does he think he is? He reminds me of a drill sergeant at a military boot camp. I never joined the military because of that kind of attitude. I'm also sick of people who aren't managers at all, but are naturally bossy (and these people usually fall into the same category of stupid people too). I've had co-workers that are so bossy that I never would even say hi to them, and they also just had a really bad attitude.

I am sick and tired of those people who tell me I have a bad attitude, but I really don't. It's like I tell everyone else, "you give me lip I give lip right back. But you give me kindness I'll give you kindness right back." Just because I ignore you doesn't mean I have an attitude. I usually ignore people I can't stand. However, the rest of this world hasn't figured that out. I can't tell you the number of times I'll be talking to someone, and they'll tell me how they can't stand a certain person at all and next thing you know they're having a conversation with that person. Why talk to somebody if you obviously don't like them? For starters, that can fool that person into thinking you do like them when you don't, and if you talk to somebody you don't like they may annoy you by something they say or vice versa, and start some argument or fight. This problem can be solved by not talking to them. Unfortunately, if you're a manager this is different. There is an exception to this rule, but why do you think I'm not a manager nor do I want to be one?

In closing, I am just fed up with how people are in this world these days and would like to make a change. We can do it. We can make that difference. Quoting Back to the Future, "If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything." America, we are a free people and we should fight for our rights! We might not be able to end ignorance, and bossiness, but we can at least shrink that problem by thinking before we act. And as far as taxes and gas prices go we can definitely change that through protests. If we can somehow get enough people for 1 week to say 'no" to the gas stations by not getting gas, that might say something. Too many people are afraid though. There have been "no gas" days before where people were supposed to say "no" to gas, but there weren't enough people involved. Why not? Because people don't care anymore. We live in a time where it's every man for himself. People with I can't lose my job attitudes, but if you get enough people involved what do you have to lose? The man can try, but if he's overpowered he's going to lose. We can do it, America. We can end this madness that we are suffering through the power of protest. It's time once again, America.  Time to make a change. Time to start a revolution!

Tran-Siberian Orchestra Play In Little Rock on December 29, 2007

My mom and I went to see the Tran-Siberian Orchestra in Little Rock, Arkansas.  I never even heard of them until she told me about them last year, but they apparently have been around since 1996.  I really enjoyed the show and I definitely love what they are doing with music.  What they are is this huge group (I believe of about 10 musicians), and some of them are classically trained and some were rock musicians.  What they are doing is bringing classical music to the rock fans.  They are definitely a group I feel will be around for a long time and if they ever come to your town their show is definitely worth going to!  Laser lights and everything!  I give them 5 stars out of 5 stars.

LIVIN’ IN THE CITY

 

(VERSE:)
I live in a small rural town where everything closes down
Nothing ever goes on around.
So I close my eyes and all I can think about
Is my past big city life!

(CHORUS:)
Livin’ in the city, life can be so pretty
In the city, that’s where I come from

(VERSE:)
Concrete all around
Night life all abound
There is always something to do, there is always something new
Where traffic jams are nothing new
But you can always get through if you knew what to do

(CHORUS)

(VERSE:)
City limits – never ending.
Something to do everywhere you turn to
30 miles – another suburb
look here, look there – another mall
downtown buildings can be so tall

(CHORUS)

(VERSE:)
In the sky – aircraft all around
Sometimes you can get lost and never be found
At night you see the neon lights
And when you’re cruisin’ you run into the traffic lights

(CHORUS)

“LONG ROAD OUT OF EDEN” CD review

It took them 20 some odd years and a few live gigs since they got back together in 1994, but The Eagles have officially came back on October 30, 2007. That date marks a date in Eagles history because even though they have been back together since the Hell Freezes Over tour in 1994, they haven’t really put out many new studio tracks – just a few here and there. “Hell Freezes Over” had 4 new tracks and the rest were live tracks of their best songs. There double CD they put out back in 2002 titled “The Very Best of The Eagles” had “Hole In The World.” We were beginning to wonder if they were going to put out a new studio disc. After waiting for 13 years (how long they been back together) they finally recorded a new studio disc. 2 discs – 11 on disc 1, 9 on disc 2. This time however, the album is exclusively sold at wal-mart or on their website.

Both CDs have the full eagles sound on it. The first disc starts out with “No More Walks In The Wood” – it’s an a-capella song that kind of reminds me “seven bridges road.” Than comes a countrified-rock “how long” sung by Glenn Frey. Obviously a hit. “busy being fabulous” – sung by Don Henley. Another great track. Above all, I think my most favorite track so far is the next track. “What Do I Do With My Heart” sung by the great Glenn Frey. It’s a slow love song. The next track is sung by who I’d like to call the comedian of the crime “Guilty Of The Crime” by Joe Walsh. Then Glenn Frey sings the mellow rocker “I Don’t Want To Hear Anymore.” Don Henley than sings the mellow “Waiting In The Weeds.” “No More Cloudy Days” sung by Glenn Frey was previewed on their Farewell 1 tour. It’s another really awesome track which is single material. “Fast Company” is a rocky song sung by Don Henley and Glenn Frey. “Do Something” is a very mellow hit sung by Glenn Frey. The last track on the first disc is “You Are Not Alone” – another mellow track by Glenn Frey.

It seems like Disc 2 is more or less about anti-terrorism and the war in Iraq and it opens with the title track. Despite the fact it’s about 10 minutes long, “Long Road Out Of Eden” is a great mellow song sung by Don Henley. “I Dreamed There Was No War” is a 1 and a half minute instrumental by Glenn Frey, he than goes on to sing the rocker “Somebody.” Don Henley than sings the rocky “Frail Grasp On The Big Picture” – which seems to be about the media. Joe Walsh than goes on to sing “Last Good Time In Town”. Glenn Frey than sings the mellow “I Love To Watch A Woman Dance.” Don Henley than sings the rocky number “Business As Usual” and the mellow “Center of The Universe” with Glenn Frey. Glenn Frey than sings the closing track – the mellow “It’s Your World Now.”

Overall, “Long Road Out of Eden” is an awesome album. Even though you can tell there changes in styles in the songs since their albums of the 1970s – you still can hear the Eagles distinctive sound. That’s one thing that will never change. If you love The Eagles go out and buy this CD. You won’t be disappointed.

Spring 2007 Performance At The Lyric Theatre, Harrison, Arkansas

 

For those of you who weren’t at the Lyric Theater in Harrison, Arkansas you missed such a great show! I was with one of the acts, so of course I didn’t have to pay the $10 fee to get in. It started at 8:00pm and lasted until 10:00pm. It had this little 4 year old girl sing a country song - which was really cute. (http://www.thelyricharrison.com).

The Kingtut Blues Band (which I am happy and proud to say that I am very involved a lot with. My best friend is the leader of the group. I try to help the band out a lot when I’m needed because I’m younger, and they need some help loading/unloading equipment. – I am one of the few people who is proud to call themselves a roadie. I just love music, so I wouldn’t care if I’m just a rodie). The band sounds much better than it had a few years ago. Now because of new personnel with the band, they play quite a few originals, also. Griz Adams (who plays keys, harp and sax for the band) sings "Start Singin' The Blues" which he wrote, which is a very good blues song. Bill Lusk (on rhythm guitar) sings "Too Much Time." A song he wrote a few years back. Both are very good numbers in there own right. Tut and I both agree each is a great asset to the band. After there set, the band than played for “Elvis”! Cody Slaughter is a 15 year old kid who is an awesome Elvis Impersonator. I swear, he must eat sleep and dream Elvis! He was that good! There is a performance on May 12th with this Elvis Impersonator at the Lyric Theater on May 12th. If you are in the area, you should see him. The Kingtut Blues Band will be backing him too, so if you go you are most definitely in for a real treat!!! After that, there was a great accordion player. And that was all before the intermission! Just wait, it gets even better - and Tut even joined us in the audience to watch the rest of the show too! (http://www.kingtutbluesband.com).

After the intermission, the host of the show (who is from the country station KHOZ) came back on stage and was looking for guys without much hair. Tut was busy talking to someone so he didn't really know what was going on. I motioned him to get up there and he just gives me this look and asks me why. I just told him to get up there. When he got up there, he figured out why he was going up there soon enough. That was when he put his cap back on. The host from KHOZ yelled at him for that, making him take it off.

They were looking for the guy with the least amount of hair, so I had our group clap harder when they came up to Tut. They voted for a 3rd place winner, 2nd place winner, and a 1st place winner. The 3rd and 2nd place winners won tickets to a Branson show and the 1st place winner won 2 tickets to see the Titanic Museum in Branson. Tut didn't win anything though.

And then there was a 16 year old dancer who did a couple routines (a country song I can't remember and than "Let's Get It Started" by the Black Eyed Peas). She was such a great dancer (and runs her own dance studio in Harrison by the way). Her name was Dalia Garrison and her dance troupe is called "High Voltage." They'll be on the TV show "America's Got Talent" sometime soon, so be on the look-out for her on national TV. Very awesome dancing routine she has, which she choreographed herself!

After that, they brought out Taylor Reed to do some magic (yes, the Taylor Reed that performs in Branson). He is a really awesome magician and he has really great stage presence. I have never had the honor to see his show yet, but after what I saw tonight, it's definitely on my list of definite must see Branson shows. I did have the honor to shake his hand though, and tell him how great he was - so I guess you could say I got to meet him. He was loading up his "supplies" after the show tonight when I was helping Tut load up his gear, and I joked with him for a second by saying, "Now don't be sawing any more people in half, that'll cause a major lawsuit," and he thought it was funny. (http://www.taylorreed.com).

The next act was a great one in their own right. It was the "From Patsy To Present" show in Branson. They did 4 songs to give you a great idea on what their show is like. I was kind of skeptical about them at first because I'm not much of a Patsy Cline fan, but after seeing there performance tonight, it is also on my list of must see shows in Branson. They are a family of 3, with the mother (who I guess also runs there show) being the Patsy Cline singer, and she sounds just like her too. And I think, by far, the most amazing part of the whole show tonight (that possibly even stole the show) was there son's drumming. He is now 15 years old, he first picked up the sticks at the age of 11. Everybody in the house even gave him a standing ovation. It is no wonder on there website they call him a teen drumming sensation. I'd like to call him a Drummer Extrodanaire, myself! One of the greatest drummers I have ever heard in my 27 years on this rock!!! Such a musical prodigy. You definitely can tell with his playing skills that he is gonna go far in the business. When it was over, I got a chance to meet the young lad and shake his hand and talk to him for a second. I wished him the best of luck in his future. Remember his name, because he could be performing near you someday. Josh Roberts. (http://www.patsyinbranson.net).

Be on the lookout for all these guys I saw tonight. They were all absolutely amazing, and extremely talented, and very inspirational. It just makes me want to pick up my axe and my harp, and never give up on the dream. I can only play one song well. And I don't even have the guts to show people the original stuff I have written. Someday maybe. If ever I get rid of the stage fright. I'd be happy to go on stage to do just one or 2 songs. Or maybe record a couple songs on CD and try to sell the CD instead. I love music, and I like to play when I do - even if it is "in the closet.” When you get a chance come see them perform where-ever it is they may be performing at.

Overall, it was a very awesome show, and it was too bad I couldn't shoot good pictures in there or good video. The lighting was really bad for my camera. I kept some that I took that were ok, but they could've been better. If you want a copy of the 2 videos I shot, let me know. but I'm warning you, they aren’t pretty.

On another note, I have been writing since I was 13. I started out writing short scripts (plays) and short stories, but than at around the same age I also started getting into writing poetry. Around 1995 (when I started getting into music, and playing guitar) I started trying to write my own songs, but none of them turned out any good. I have a folder I keep that has stuff I have written over the last 12 years in it, and of all the 12 years I have been writing the best stuff is now just starting to come out. Also in recent years, I have started writing articles for my own purposes, starting with my high school newspaper from 1997-1999.

I was 8 or so when I got my first guitar, but didn't have much of an interest in it. It wasn't until 1993 when I started getting an interest in people like Chuck Berry, Elvis Presley, Little Richard, Buddy Holly, etc, but it wasn't until I saw the Beatles Anthology special on ABC in 1995 when I sealed my fate as to what I really wanted to do in life. Play music. But than sometimes your dreams do fade away because you realize you're not as talented as other people are, but you can at least get close to the action by being a roadie. And who knows, I might actually be up there someday. I'm still young. I got a lot of years ahead of me still!

I guess you could say I'm an artist in my own right. I like to create things, and putting things creative together. I'm just not very well known for my craft because I don't try to sell myself, for obvious reasons. I would actually like to give my website a complete overhaul (perhaps all my websites). I started the Kingtut Blues Band site, and I really like what the new guy Tut hired has done to the band's website. I had to give up working on the band's website because my computer crashed and I still haven't had it fixed, so after a month he needed to find someone else to work on it. I just met the guy today who works on it now, and he's a really nice fellow and maybe perhaps sometime he and I can collaborate on ideas and designs for the website or something. I don't know. I didn't get a chance to talk to him much so I wasn't able to discuss business with him, but I would have liked to. When I do get my computer fixed (hopefully within the next year) I plan on giving my site a complete overhaul, and this time adding a blog so I can put articles like this one on the site. I have wanted to put a blog on my site for quite some time, but I don't always have much to say so I never did. Most days would be left empty, so the blog would've than been hardly updated. If you would like to check out my site and bookmark it so you can see when it is updated, I'm at http://www.mikeirvan.com. Thanks for reading. I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have writing it. If you would like to contact me to chat or something, you can E-Mail me at mikeirvan@suddenlink.net. Oh, and stay tuned for my Chuck Berry performance article on Friday.

WHAT DID I DO?

 

FEELIN’ ALL ALONE IN THIS WORLD.
I REALLY DON’T KNOW VERY MANY GIRLS.

FEELIN’ SO DEPRESSED.
BUT IT’S NOTHING I CAN’T REGRET.

I LIVE MY LIFE AS A LONER
BECAUSE NO ONE  HARDLY MAKES AN EFFORT TO GET TO KNOW ME.

MY DAD ALWAYS TELLS ME LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT.
IT’S KIND OF HARD WITH NO ONE AROUND!
MY DAD JUST DON’T KNOW HALF OF IT.
HE NEVER WILL.

MY PAST SCREWED ME FOR LIFE.
AND MY LIFE SCREWED ME TO THIS DAY.
IT SEEM LIKE HARDLY ANYONE WANNA BE COOL WITH ME.
I FEEL LIKE I’M PAYIN’ THE PRICE FOR SUMTHIN’ I DID WRONG.

WHAT DID I DO?
AIN’T GOT A CLUE.

WHAT DID I DO TO MAKE PEOPLE HATE ON ME SO MUCH?
AIN’T GOT A CLUE.

THEY SEE ME AND JUST WALK ON BY!
WHAT DID I DO?

I GOT A GIRL

 

I got a girl
so I need to start to talk
I got a girl
that I would call,
but the first time I did
her father scared me off
I love a girl
her name is   
she's my
and I'm the worst 'cause I'm too shy
when I'm behind her I don't wrap my arms around her
and I want to.
When I'm next to her I don't put my hand
to where she can hold it, unless she wants to
even though I want to try.
I don't instigate kisses
because I never know if she wants to kiss me then!
I never instigate conversation with her
because people say I talk about stupid things!
I love her!
I think I should become a better lover!

LONER’S WORLD

 

Always miserable
Always depressed
Always anti-social
Everyone makes you miserable

They say things that are interpreted to be mean

Rather be alone
Don’t like nobody hardly
Been this way my whole life

Valentine’s day one day I can’t stand
Feel like I never amount to anything

Last Weeks of School

Three years at this school!
I spent three years at this school!
I feel such a fool!
But at least not everybody treats me cruel!
They are so cool, they rule!
They boosted up my personality a little,
But I still am in the middle!
I guess that's ok,
I know where I'll be
Spending my days.
I'm glad I'll be getting paid.
Did I make the grade?
Four more weeks
And then, do I earn my keep?
I'll be able to get lots of sleep,
I feel free!!
Assholes, let me be.
I need a date,
So girls, I'm the bait!

I KNOW A GIRL

 

I know a girl in my life,
her name is          .
She actually likes me,
I heard the birds and the bees.
She had to go
and I love her so.
We had to go.
At first I had fear
but I can't wait till next year!
She's the girl in my dreams
and the first one to like me.
I love her so!
I just got hit with Cupid's bow.
I'll find out where she lives,
and then I can't wait till Valentine's Day
so I can say, "She's my babe."
      can make me soar
up in the sky.
I love her so.

I HATE SCHOOL (HOW UNFAIR)

 

I hate school!
It treats me so cruel!
No one likes me there!
It's so unfair!
I hate school!
They make me feel like a fool,
How cruel!
I hate school!
Couped up in a rat house!
I hate school!
They're the true fools!
I did nothing wrong!
How unfair!
I feel so bare!
I used to feel so grand,
But now I don't want to see the school land!
They make me look like a trouble maker!
What a bunch of fakers,
Turn on your thinkers!
I feel like I'm in prison!
I wouldn't be surprised if they find me missin',
The way I feel, I'd rather be ditchin'
'Cause they don't listen!
Oh, I hate school!

WHY CAN’T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?

Why is it that people just feel they have to be so hateful because they can’t stand somebody? I don’t get it. I’ve always tried to be nice to everyone, but others don’t try. Some people will just look at what other people do and because they wouldn’t do such a thing they’d hate them for it.

My wife and I have been together since March of 2004. A month or so after we started dating, My mom and her mom first met. Well, I was actually hoping my mom and my wife’s mom could be friends. But for some reason, a month or so later my mom decided she didn’t like my wife’s mother. No one really knows why but it is just upsetting everybody. Because of it my mom has told me to choose between my wife or my parents! So if I choose my wife (whom I love very much) my mom doesn’t really want to have anything to do with me. She claims she doesn’t want anything to do with my mother-in-law because she “knows her kind” – stating that her mom was that way! My wife was never bounced around in foster care, and even though my mother-in-law partied a lot in her younger days my wife and her siblings always had food on the table, and they were always cared for by her mom. I also don’t really think my wife was ever ripped off by her mom. My mom, however, growing up was bounced around in foster care, and her mom partied a lot and ripped her kids off.

My mother-in-law may not be the smartest person in the world, and she’ll be the first one to admit that she has done some dumb things in her life but she’s only human! No one is perfect. She may have got a credit card for my wife last year without my wife’s permission, which is actually illegal, but it was gotten for good intentions. When my mom caught wind of it all hell breaks loose and my mom says that is wrong! A month ago somebody tried to get a cell phone and a walmart credit card in my dad’s name. My parents immediately point the finger at my mother-in-law all because they can’t stand her and a phone book shows up at our house with my dad’s name on it. How can my mother-in-law get anything in my dad’s name when we don’t have any of my dad’s information over here, and what info we do have we weren’t even aware of until he told us after his info was stolen. His social security number is on my savings bonds. Those are in my wife’s lock box. That lock box you can’t break into, and there’s only one key to it and my wife has it. That lock box was lost under everything in a closet since we moved in back in august. My mother-in-law has carpal tunnel, bone diseases, is going blind, among other things, and she’s also computer illiterate. Do you think that she could actually find my wife’s lock box in the closet, jar it open for those savings bonds (not even knowing they were in there and had my dad’s social # on it?) and placed it back in the closet and not leave any marks on the box that showed it was tampered with? It is logically and physically impossible. In the words of my father-in-law, “Wow, she’s good!” When my wife told my mom all this she started accusing my wife, her mom (still), and her step-dad, and a friend of her mom’s! A friend of her’s that has never stepped foot in our house! Even though I didn’t do it, for all my mom knows I could’ve stolen my dad’s information, but she didn’t even try accusing me. Just people my wife knew.

We don’t know who did it. All that we do know is that my mother-in-law, nor my wife or anyone else accused didn’t do it. But my mom has no intentions on apologizing for the accusations until she finds out the truth. But she’ll never hear the truth from us because she is so stuck up in her ways. Once she believes in something you can’t talk her out of it. My mom has cost my wife her job so now my wife is looking for a new one, but it is hard finding jobs in small towns where you can make decent money that can pay the bills. And even though my mother-in-law has helped us out also my parents are trying to manipulate me to believe that my mother-in-law did nothing for us and my parents are the only ones who have. You can’t manipulate me when I know differently. My mother-in-law helped get us groceries, get our heat turned on, she even gave me a ride to work sometimes. My parents may have done more by getting a car for us, washer/dryer for us, helping us with deposit and 1^st month’s rent for our first apartment, and helping us move. Both my parents and my in-laws have done an equal amount of helping my wife and I out when we need it.

So why can’t my parents just get along with my mother-in-law? She isn’t all that bad of a person. I may not like the idea of her staying with us at the moment but it is only temporary. Until her and her husband find a place. In the meantime she is here to help us pay the bills, and so my wife can take of her. So my mom should just quit her whining and bitching and accusations for my wife’s and mine sake!

TAKE US OUT OF THAT SILLY WAR

 

Mr. President, why don’t you listen to me
All it’ll cost you is for free
I wish you could see what the American public sees.
Mr. President, why can’t you please take us out of that silly war.

MESSAGE TO MY PARENTS

 

Hey, dad look at me,
I know you’ll never see, I’ll never be who you want me to be
I’ll never be what you want me to be, but I’m happy
Well, at least I try to be

I can’t be perfect, can’t nobody can
I wish you could be proud of me, man
But I still love you, dad.

I love you, but I wanna be free
Free from the fussing and fighting at me
Please let me be free
I can’t take it.  I wanna be free.

Your Love - lyrics

This is a song I wrote when I was with my ex-wife. Enjoy.

 

YOUR LOVE

Your love is for free
Your love is all I believe
Your love is all I wanna see
Your love is all I wanna be
Your love comes for cheap
My Dane’le, you are special to me

Your love, your love
Your love, your love
Your love, your love
Your love, your love

By land, or by sea
Always together we will be
Your love makes me feel free
As the wind blows, I feel a good breeze
Everyone else can just let me be
Cause your love is all I need

Your love, your love
Your love, your love
Your love, your love
Your love, your love

THE POOR MAN’S POVERTY BLUES

 

Gas prices going up,
It gets me so fed up!
This war in Iraq,
What’s up with that?
Mr. President, listen to the poor man
Because we are not your fans!

You are so insane,
You can’t even hear our pain!
You are so lame,
You can’t even feel our pain!

The war on terror I agree with,
But I’m pissed!
What does Iraq got to do with it?
It’s not our war, just like ‘Nam!
Mr. President, you are such a con!

I work, but all my money goes to a big fat jerk!
Every day I just keep getting poorer and poorer!
My wife and I?
We sufferin’ financially!
Why won’t you hear our plea?
We are living in Poor Man’s Poverty!

I AM A PREP

I am a prep
I am a threat to this world
I am a prep
It’s all about my ego
I am a prep

I like to make fun of others for how they are
I am a prep
I only care about myself
I am a prep
I’m very selfish
I am a prep

I am big, and think I’m all dat
I am a prep
I tell others that they’re slow when they may be faster than I
I am a prep
I hate others that aren’t like me
I am a prep

Why am I like this?
I am a prep
Why do I always feel like I should diss?
I am a prep
Why am I so mean?
I am a prep
Why are there some people out to get me?
I am a prep
Maybe it’s because I’m so mean
I am a prep

SNOWFALL

 

I see the snow fall from the sky,
I see it fall for you and I!
It is making piles and piles
for miles and miles!
I see the snow fall on the ground.
I pick it up and throw it all around!
The sidewalk is so icy
and so it's ficety!
I see the snow fall from the sky
that is really really high!
There are so many snowflakes
that I can make 10 million cakes,
but I can't bake, so I'll just eat each
snowflake as they fall!
I see the snow fall from the sky!
Now I don't see the snowfall,
It's just slick ice!
I wouldn't drive
'cause it's so bad,
so it makes me mad!
I see the snow fall from the sky!

The Slum Lords of Harrison

(Note: when my ex and I first lived together, we rented a house with her mom from probably the worst landlords in Harrison, Arkansas.  For liability purposes I won’t disclose who the landlords were - but those who lived in there rental properties probably know who they are.  Lot of people who lived in Harrison will probably agree that they are the slum lords of Harrison, Arkansas.)

 

(Come one, come all!  Cheap housing at expensive pricing!!)
(repeat)

Come gather round people,
I have a story to tell
About a business that is going to hell
$450 a month, does that ring a bell?
These people don’t care
They don’t care if you even fell
All they want is your money,
And that’s not even funny

Come down here and listen
This is there latest mission
From the slum lords of Harrison
Rent you a dump now do you feel conned?
These bastards don’t care
They don’t care if you poor
All they want is for you to feel sore
And I know we all get ignored

Destiny - lyrics

another one I wrote called “Destiny”.

DESTINY

What’s mine?
Is there a sign?
Trying to figure it out
What is life all about?
This I ponder as I sit here on the couch

Sit and wonder
Sit and wonder
What do I do?
What do I do?

Do I get on stage just to get booed?
Or do I write something offensive just to get sued?
Or do I just eat up all of my food?

We all have a destiny
What could it be?

When I See You - lyrics

This is just another song I wrote.

WHEN I SEE YOU

I love you
I’ve loved you since I first saw you
When I see you, I think marvelous view
Baby, when I see you

When I see you,
My skies turn from grey to blue
You are so very dear and true to me
Baby, can you see that I love you honestly?
I just love it when I see you

When I see you
My world feels full
My world is complete
Now I got you
Dear, I love you and I always will
Even after 60 years, I should still
When I see you

“RAY” Movie Review

· I finally was able to see the biopic “RAY” with Jamie Foxx in the lead role as the late-great Ray Charles, and let me tell you: it is most definitely a must see for every music fan and musicologist!

· Jamie Foxx fit the part perfectly, and this I found very astounding. I find it really amazing how you can’t picture certain actors in certain rolls and they do the job perfectly! They’d do such a good job they deserve Oscar nominations for them. A real good example is Will Smith portraying the great Mahammad Ali in “ALI”. No one, knowing the norm of his usual rolls, would ever picture him playing such a serious character as Ali. Will, I never pictured Jamie Foxx portraying the great Ray Charles either. Not with what he usually does, but he did so will at it that you’d think it was really Ray!

· The movie starts off when he was in his late teens in the 1940s when he goes from his hometown in Georgia all the way to Seattle, Washington where he got his break. A 5 day road trip, and there he mysteriously runs into Quincy Jones, who was just a teenager at the time – I’m sure his name does ring a bell.

· One thing I didn’t know about Ray until I saw this film was that he was an adulterer and a drug addict. He was a heroin addict for quite some time until he finally kicked it in 1966. According to some online information about him, he started using dope when he was 16. He also experimented with Marijuana. I was really surprised and it just goes to show how naïve I really am about all the great musicians. A lot of them I wouldn’t think would ever have done such a thing like committing adultery or use dope, but it just goes to show how much you can underestimate their persona because of their music. All the great music legends may be music legends and icons but they all have deep dark domestic secrets. Whether it be drug abuse or adultery! Paul McCartney still smokes Marijuana to help influence his music.

· The movie pretty much ends in 1966 when he kicked his drug habit, but it’s a definite must see. It talks about his upbringing from poverty, to his struggling as a musician in Seattle trying to score a record deal, he tries to find love, and even though he has found it he’d prefer being with a groupie girl more and using his dope more than being with his wife and 2 kids, and than he realizes that his kids wasn’t worth it so he goes and gets clean and breaks the heroin addiction for good, but most of all it’s about his great music! We will all miss Ray Charles and I’m sure this movie is great for memory’s sake! I give it an A+++

· Ray Charles - RIP - 1930 - 2004

I MISS YOU, I LOVE YOU

 

I MISS YOU, I LOVE YOU
DANE’LE, I MISS YOU – I LOVE YOU
EVEN THOUGH YOU IN ILLINOIS,
WISH YOU WAS HERE.
OH, YOU IN ILLINOIS,
AND THAT’S WHY I MISS YOU SO
I MISS YOU SO ‘CAUSE YOU AIN’T HERE
YOU IN ILLINOIS AND I’M DOWN HERE.

EVERY DAY I’VE BEEN SAD –
EVERY DAY I’VE BEEN CRYIN’
OH, EVERY DAY I’VE BEEN SAD –
EVERY DAY I’VE BEEN CRYIN’
YOU’RE NOT HERE AND THAT’S WHY I FEEL BLUE.
OH, YOU’RE NOT HERE AND THAT IS TRUE.

RIGHT NOW I’M CRYING –
RIGHT NOW I’M LONELY.
OH, JUST WANNA BE WITH YOU
EVERY DAY SPENT WITH YOU.
YOU’RE NOT HERE THAT’S WHY I’M FEELIN’ BLUE
OH, YOU’RE NOT HERE BUT I GET LONELY WITHOUT YOU.

SO HOW DID 21ST CENTURY POP MUSIC COME TO BE ANYWAY?

If you are in your teens or 20s, chances are you enjoy listening to such musical acts like Limp Bizkit, Korn, Britney Spears, Dr. Dre, Eminem, Snoop Dogg, Evanescence among thousands of others. But where did these styles we hear today come from? I know that you don’t hear the resemblance in it at all, but it comes from 100 years of musical evolution and experimenters!

In the late 1800s and early 1900s, old western cowboys would play an acoustic guitar around a campfire, which could be classified as cowboy music. About the same time down in the southern part of the country, musicians playing different world music styles like celtic and different instruments, they came up with a style called bluegrass, which is still popular today among some southerners. This was the same time period that slavery was still going on in the country, and the black slaves would sing their “holler” songs. These holler songs is what evolved into blues music in the 1920s. In the 1920s, black musicians from the Mississippi Delta started picking up guitars and playing them with a different style, and added a Hawaiian style of playing to it by breaking their empty liquor bottles and using the shattered glass as a slide to do slide guitar with, but instead of playing it laying down in their lap like the Hawaiians did, they played slide with the guitar sitting upright. Bluegrass guitarists picked up on the style too, but chose to play slide in their lap like Hawaiians did. Sometime after the blues came onto the scene, New Orleans musicians got a hold of the style, and fused it with their own style that came from a classical feel, which became jazz music. When whites got a hold of jazz at this time, and made it somewhat fast, it became known as swing. In the 1930s and 1940s is when some musicians took this blues, bluegrass, and the cowboy music and fused them all together which became country music. In the 1940s and 1950s, some Mississippi Delta blues musicians moved north to Chicago and were introduced to electricity, and started plugging in there instruments, and came up with the electric blues sound. Some of them, because of the new electric sound, started playing their blues at a faster pace which was soon to become Rock & Roll (this includes Chuck Berry). In 1950s Texas, Buddy Holly and Bill Haley, among others, started playing country songs on electric, and faster which gave a new style and sound and they became the first known ROCK stars! It’s about this same time when an unknown recording studio in Memphis, Tennessee owned by Sam Phillips called “Sun Records” were producing songs for acts like Jerry Lee Lewis, Elvis Presley, Carl Perkins and Johnny Cash. When Elvis Presley came onto the scene, no one before him tried fusing electric blues and electric country together. When we into the army in 19659 or 1960 and when the Big Bopper, Ritchie Valens and Buddy Holly died in a horrible plane wreck in February 1959, everyone thought that rock and roll died.

In Southern California in the early 1960s, surfing was a big thing among kids, and musicians would start putting out a different kind of rock called “surf” music. It was really mellow, but it was full of melodies, and Harmonies. At about this same time, some acoustic musicians were getting into a style called “Folk” music, and it was starting to become a phenomenon. At the same time, groups in England were experimenting with American music, but making it louder and heavier. When the Beatles came onto the American scene in February 1964, American musicians started realizing they needed to make a change musically. So in California musicians started fusing surf rock with folk and came up with the “folk-Rock” sound of Mamas & Papas and Bob Dylan, and even the hippy groups from San Francisco, California. About the same time in Detroit, Michigan Berry Gordy founded Motown Records and started signing black acts to perform on his label. Even though there was R&B in the 50s, that was a mixture of blues and rock, The 1960s R&B sound was different. It was like a fusion of Jazz and Blues. In the late 1960s, some Motown musicians (known as the Funk Brothers) among other R&B musicians, started using more bass lines than anything else, which became funk.

In the 1970s, we had a second british invasion with groups like Led Zeppelin which were harder and heavier than previous styles, which became known as Heavy Metal. At about the same time, R&B musicians, who became funk musicians for a time, created disco, which lasted until 1980. In the late 70s, there was a new kind of music come onto the scene in New York City called Rap. The idea came for it came from DJs for funk stations in Philadelphia would rap community info over the records. The first popular rap song was a disco song called “Good Times”. The group who put it out, The Sugarhill Gang, changed the words and gave it a faster beat and than called it “Rapper’s Delight”, which is probably where the name for the music, “RAP”, came from. In 1985, Aerosmith and Run-DMC got together and put out the first ever rap/rock song. A song called “Walk This Way.” In the late 1980s, street gangsters from southern California got a hold of the music and came up with Gangster Rap.

In the early 1990s, bands from Seattle, Washington came onto the scene with a style that wasn’t like anything else. At the time they called it grunge, but it was early alternative rock. At about this time, a group known as The Red Hot Chili Peppers came onto the scene with a funky rock sound. Probably was the first band to do Rock with a Rap feel. In the mid 1990s, metal started becoming more popular than ever, and some metal acts started combining their style with rap, and came up with Rap/Metal.

As for the Britney Spears, NSync, Mandy Moore and Christina Aguilera sound? It’s R&B, but modern R&B. Which comes from rap beats, but just more mellow, and I told you where rap came from.

There you have it, folks. Now you know where 21^st century popular music came from, you should appreciate the older stuff still, because if it weren’t for that older stuff you wouldn’t have what you hear today!

LOCAL BAND BRINGS CLASSIC ROCK AND BLUES SOUND TO THE OZARKS

The Kingtut Blues Band has been around for over two years, and they play all kinds of gigs all over the state of Arkansas. The band was formed by 50 year old Tut Campbell who first moved to Arkansas back in 1997. Tut grew up in Atlanta, Georgia where he played blues and classic rock music with bands there. His main love is blues, but his heritage is classic rock.

The band now consists of Tut Campbell from Harrison, Arkansas on Guitars; Pat "Jawbone" Kenyon from Little Rock, Arkansas on Harp; Todd Richard from Bentonville, Arkansas on bass; Jesse Humphrey also from Little Rock, Arkansas on keyboards; and Ricky Bowen from Springdale, Arkansas on Drums. In the past, Alan Clark, Michael Shwade, Mark McGee and Rob Henderson had played with the Kingtut Blues Band also.

Lately, I have been going to there gigs a lot, and they do put on a really good show! I think if I had to choose what songs I like to hear the most, it'd either be Tut's rendition of Cream's "Sunshine of Your Love" or Todd's renditon of Bob Dylan's "Knockin' On Heaven's Door."

The band has 2 CDs available of Tut's favorite blues songs. "Blues Power" and "Mo' Blues". THere is another CD available for sale of some of Tut's originals, called "Resurrection Express." They also have shirts available.

If you are interested in buying any of these CDs or T-Shirts, or want to know where there gigs are at so you can see them play, just go to www.kingtutbluesband.com.

INSECURE

 

ALWAYS FEEL DISRESPECTED
NOTHING EVER TO REPRESENT
SOCIETY MAKES ME FEEL NEGLECTED
I STILL HAVEN’T FELT ACCEPTED
THAT’S WHY I’M IN A STATE OF DEPRESSION!
LOOK IN THE MIRROR, I HATE MY REFLECTION!
VERY INSECURE AND THAT’S A CONFESSION
100 PERCENT, THAT’S ALL I’LL ADMIT
SOMETIMES I FEEL I’M GONNA THROW A FIT
I HATE MYSELF, ALL OF IT!
SO DAMN INSECURE WITH MYSELF AND I’M HATIN’ IT!
HATE MY LOOKS, MY IMAGE
I DON’T EVEN HAVE ENOUGH CONFIDENCE

I FEEL USED, ABUSED, REFUSED,
NEVER REALLY LOVED AND SO CONFUSED.
TELL ME – WHAT SHOULD I DO?
SO DAMN INSECURE
THAT I HAVTA LIVE MY LIFE IN SO MUCH FEAR
SO INSECURE I FEEL I NEED TO DRINK MORE BEER
NOT MUCH CONFIDENCE,
SO I FEEL MY LIFE IS FULL OF HOLES AND DENTS
SO MANY THINGS I WOULD LIKE TO CHANGE
BUT WHERE DO I START?
MY LIFE IS PULLED SO APART!

LOOKING FOR FUN
LOOKING FOR LOVE
LOOKING TO BE LIKED AND NOT DISLIKED
LOOKING TO BE ACCEPTED AND NOT REJECTED
LOOKING TO HAVE BETTER FEELINGS
TOWARDS PEOPLE INSTEAD OF ALL THE BAD VIBES I FEEL
LOOKING TO BE WITH LOTS OF PEOPLE
HANG AND CHILL
TIRED OF BEING BY MYSELF
IT’S MAKING ME ILL
HOW SHOULD I FEEL?
I’M SO INSECURE
WHAT SHOULD I DO?

THE LONER

 

Why am I never accepted?
Why am I always shy?
Why was I treated poorly by all my peers growing up?
Why couldn’t they have treated me better?
Why did my past affect my present (or even worse my future)?
Why can’t I just go on with my life?
Why at one point I can feel happy, but most of the time I don’t?
Why can’t I break away from my fear of rejection?
Why do I always feel ignored?
Why do people have there get togethers and parties and never invite me?
Why is my social life the internet?
Why am I such a loner?
Why am I never loved by anyone?
Why have I never been in a real relationship when I want one so bad?
Why is it that when I find her, I’m finally happy and than she breaks my heart?
Why do I still love her?
Why do I feel like I’m a threat to society?
I never wanted to be popular, I just wanted to be accepted.
I do see popular people and I wish I had what they have (a life)!
They have friends, parties, relationships!!!
I don’t really have all that (actually I feel I don’t have none that)
I’m always so bored, lonely, depressed!
Why do I wish that some people my age I knew could read some of my stuff and see the real me?
I feel they’d actually like me if they just found out about the real me and not just ignore me!

I Love You So Much

BABY, NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD EVER FIND YOU
AND NOW THAT I FOUND YOU, DON’T EVER WANNA LET U GO
HAVIN’ 2 WAIT 6 DAYS IS TORTURE TO MY SOUL!

LOVE U SO MUCH,
MISS U SO MUCH,
BABY, U KNOW IT’S TRU
I WANT US 2 REMAIN 2 AND NEVER BE THRU!

BUT WHY DO I STILL FEEL ALL ALONE?
I THINK I KNOW WHY
BECAUSE WE ONLY SEE EACH OTHER ONCE A WEEK.
I FEEL IT’S TORTURE TO HAVETA WAIT SO LONG.
I LOVE YOU!

DON’T LET ANYONE DOUBT THE NET!
TRUST ME, IT’S HOW WE MET!
IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE NET,
I PROBABLY WOULD HAVE NEVER FOUND SUMONE
QUITE AS NICE AND LOVELY AS YOU.

MARY I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!

Singing Through My Nose (parody of “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door”)

When I used to work at Wal-Mart I was talking to a friend of mine and I was telling him how back in Jr. High and High School I used to write a lot of parodies.  We got to talking about Bob Dylan and his nasally singing voice (no offense to Dylan or his fans - I’m a big fan of Bob Dylan’s also) so I thought I’d write this parody poking fun at Bob Dylan’s voice.

SINGING THROUGH MY NOSE

VERSE:
Ma, take this mic away from me
I can’t sing this anymore
It’s getting hard, too hard to sing
I think I’m singing through my nose!

CHORUS:
Sing, sing, singing through my nose
Sing, sing, singing through my nose
Sing, sing, singing through my nose

VERSE:
Ma, put my guitar in the ground
I can’t keep the beat anymore
That big black anvil is coming down
I think I’m singing through my nose!

CHORUS

Livin’ Here In Harrison (parody of “Sweet Home Alabama” by Lynyrd Skynyrd)

 

(VERSE 1:)
Boredom is seekin' in
Sunday all spent to see my kin
Hearin' songs about depression
I miss Phoenix once again
And I think it's a sin, yes!

Well I heard why some people move here
Well, I heard to get away from the city
Well, I hope they all will remember
A city man don't need to be here anyhow

(CHORUS:)
Livin' here in Harrison
Where the stores close at five
Livin' here in Harrison
Where there's nothing at all to do!

(VERSE 2:)
At Wal-Mart we all go hang out
There ain't nothing else here to do, boo hoo hoo
Leavin' here does not bother me,
Does me leavin' bother you?
Tell the truth!

(CHORUS:)
Livin' here in Harrison
Where hillbillies live
Livin' here in Harrison
Where there's cars up on blocks!

(RAP:)
Yo, Yo, Yo
I'm livin' here in harrison -
not a place to have any fun.
So many people around here own guns and they go hunt.

This town so boring,
That I spend every morning sittin' at home
And never answering the phone.

This town causes so much depression,
it makes a person go in regrettion.
And you see a lot of 100 year old traditions!
And a lot of redneck and hillbilly additions!
And a lot of confederatism
and a little bit of unneccessary racism!

This town don't go with the times,
Why do you think ever place closes at 5?
And makes Wal-Mart the only place open?
And I see a bunch of cowboys ropin'?
Nothing to do, so I'm just lophin' around!
not ever bein' proud to live here,
I gotta get out!
So sick and tired of livin' here in boredom land!

(CHORUS 2X)

Lost

UNHAPPY.  WITHOUT A SOUL.
LIFE IS IN MISERY.
WHAT AM I TO DO.  I DON’T KNOW.

I WAS PUT HERE TO BE EVERYONE’S PUNCHING BAG.
I WAS PUT HERE SO PEOPLE CAN HAVE SOMEONE TO
   HATE ON.

THE ONLY LOVE I HAVE IS MY MUSIC. 
AIN’T GOT NO WIFE, NO GIRL.  JUST MUSIC.
THE ONLY THING I REALLY CARE FOR.

NO FATHER FIGURE –
DAD WANTS ME TO BE HAPPY, BUT HE WANTS ME TO STAY
   HERE,
SO HE WON’T HELP ME GO WHERE I WANNA GO!
HE WON’T EVEN ENCOURAGE ME TO BE WHAT I WANNA BE!
AND WHEN I TELL HIM ISSUES, HE BLAMES IT ON ME!
IT’S NOT MY FAULT I GOT THESE PROBLEMS.
THE FAULT IS WHAT HAPPENED AROUND ME IN MY LIFE.
TESTS TO STUDY FOR, HE NEVER WANTED TO HELP.
ACTING LIKE I COULD DO IT MYSELF.

AIN’T GOT NO FRIENDS.
PEOPLE SEE ME, HEAR I’M MISERABLE AND NONE EVER
    INVITE ME TO DO STUFF!
I SEE THAT SOME PEOPLE JUST LIKE TO GIVE ME A DIRTY
   LOOK LIKE I’M DOING SOMETHING WRONG.
GIVE ME A LOOK OF DISGUST AS IF I’M NOT LIKED BY THEM.
THEY STRIKE CONVOS WITH OTHERS YET SEE ME AND THEY
   LEAVE.
WHY IS ALL THIS SHIT HAPPENING TO ME?

TRY TO RESPECT AND LIKE AUTHORITY. 
BUT IT’S SO VERY HARD.
95% OF THEM TREATED ME LIKE I’M A CRIMINAL.
SEE ME DOIN’ MY THANG AND JUST HARASS ME!
BE DOIN’ MY JOB, AND ONE WOULD TREAT ME LIKE I AIN’T.
TELLIN’ ME I SPEND ALL NIGHT TALKIN’ AND NOT WORKIN’!
TELLIN’ ME I AIN’T DOIN’ MY JOB AS GOOD AS I CAN WHEN I
   AM!
EXPECTIN’ ME TO BE LIKE SUPERMAN AND HAVIN’ IT 200%
   CLEAN, WHEN I CAN’T!
TELLIN’ ME HOW TO DO THINGS, WHEN I ALREADY KNOW
   HOW TO DO IT!
BLAMIN’ ME FOR THINGS I AIN’T NEVER HAD DONE
SEARCHIN’ MY BAG FOR WEAPONS WHEN ALL I EVER
   OWNED IS A BUTTER KNIFE.
IF NUN’YA AIN’T GONNA BE NICE, WHY CAN’T YOU JUST
   LEAVE ME ALONE?

TRIED TO CHANGE MY LIFESTYLE AND ATTITUDE FOR YOU
   PEOPLE.
AND YOU STUPID FUCKERS NEVER NOTICE!
WHAT’S A PERSON GOTTA DO TO BE LIKED IN THIS WORLD?
WHAT’S A PERSON GOTTA DO TO FIT INTO THIS WORLD?

WHY DON’T YOU ALL JUST OPEN YOUR EYES AND SEE WHY I
    AM WHO I AM,
QUIT IGNORIN’ ME AND LET ME IN
BECAUSE I’M SICK OF BEIN’ LEFT OUT OF THIS WORLD!
SICK OF BEIN’ ALL ALONE IN THIS WORLD!

BUT BECAUSE OF THE WAY YOU ALL TREAT ME,
I AIN’T GETTIN’ WHAT I NEED
SO MUSIC IS ALL I HAVE.
MUSIC NOW GIVES ME WHAT I NEED
MUSIC MAKES ME FEEL FREE!

You’re In Trouble

Oh-oh-oh-oh!

(Chorus:)You're in trouble,
you don't know what to do!
You're in trouble,
he's comin' after you!
You're in trouble,
oh!
You're in trouble!

You're just walkin' down the street doin' nothin'
he comes up to you and says,
"help me!" But you say, "Not me!"
Then he pulls you
and you're kidnapped!
Oh!

(Chorus)

And then he pulls a gun on you and says,
"Do as I say and you won't get hurt!"
You feel like callin' your mother
but they won't let you,
oh you!

You feel like callin' the cops
but they won't let you,
oh you!
Because

(Chorus)

So just remember your code
or you'll go in the wrong place
then say goodbye to your life
because then you would die
because you are in trouble!
(Chorus 3x)

You're in trouble, oh trouble!
Yes in trouble, be in trouble!
Nothing but trouble, in trouble!
Oh trouble!
You're in trouble!

CRAP AT WALMART

 

CRAZY INSANE?
OR INSANE CRAZY?
YOU SAY I’M LAZY
BUT YOU JUST CRAZY
YOU THE ONE LAZY!
BETTER YET, YOU JUST INSANE!

THE ONLY WAY I STAY SANE IS MY MUSIC.
THE ONLY THING A FEW GET.
THIS RAP MAY BE CRAP, BUT I SPEAK THE TRUTH.
WHILE ALL YOU FOOLS HATIN’ ON ME, HOLLERIN’, “TRUCE,
     TRUCE!”
BUT I AIN’T BOUND TO SIGN NO FUCKIN’ TREATY, WHY?
BECAUSE ALL YOU MOTHER FUCKERS ARE ALL JUST
      GREEDY!
WISH LIFE HERE WAS LIKE A HOLOGRAM, AND JUST IN 3D!
I FEEL LIKE I’M IN JAIL 24-7
WON’T SOMEBODY PLEASE RELEASE ME?
PLEASE FREE ME!

WALMART, DON’T YOU START
YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT CARTS I LEAVE.
PLEASE!
YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT TRASH I LEAVE.
BETTER WATCH OUT, YOU AIN’T GOT A CLUE WHAT’S
     HIDDEN UP MY SLEEVE!

I KNOW BETTER.
I LEAST KNOW YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT EVERYTHING,
   ANYTHING.
FOOLS BETTER BE LUCKY I DON’T SING.
AND WHEN I SCREAM, I’LL MAKE YOU DEAF
AND THAN MAKE YOU CONFESS THAT THE LOT ISN’T
    THAT BAD.
I THINK IT’S SAD.
YOUR BRAIN THINKS THE WAY IT DO!
YOU MAKE ME SO MAD.
THINK I’MA STICK YOUR HEAD TO THE WALL WITH SUPER-
      GLU!

YOU SAY I’M LAZY
BUT YOU JUST INSANE
YOU MIGHT THINK I’M CRAZY
BUT I’M JUST INSANE TRYIN’ TO STAY SANE

I BE STANDIN’ BY THE DAMN DOOR
AND I BE GETTIN’ SO DAMN BORED
WHAT AM I HERE FOR?
I’M JUST STAYIN’ POOR!

AIN’T NO WAY NOBODY SHOULD BE REPPIN’ THE W.M.T!
I HAVTA GO PEE,
THINK I’LL GO ON THE STORE’S FLOOR!

YOU MAY SAY I’M CRAZY
YOU MAY SAY I’M INSANE
NO, I’M INSANE CRAZY, CRAZY INSANE
JUST TRYIN’ TO STAY SANE
BUT IT AIN’T HAPPENIN’
AND I JUST SLAPPED MR. PHIPPS AGAINS!
OH, HERE COMES LARRY, NEED TO SHUT MY TRAP AGAIN!
THANK GOD THESE TWO AIN’T MY KIN!

YOU MAY PLAY THIS RECORD ON YOUR STEREO
YOU MAY RECOGNIZE THE STYLE
YES IT’S A SONG INFLUENCED BY EMINEM,
NO I DON’T MEAN THE CANDY,
I MEAN THE RAPPER, G!
SOMEDAY I HOPE TO GET AWAY FROM THE W.M.T
     AND BE BIGGER THAN HE!

(WALMART’S GONNA SUE ME!)

LOVESTRUCK (BUT HAS NO ONE TO LOVE)

 

I DON’T KNOW YOU.
I NEVER HAVE.
I NEVER MET YOU BEFORE.
I WISH I HAD.
SINCE I HAVEN’T FOUND YOU YET,
I’M SAD.
ONE OF THE MAIN REASON I’VE BEEN FEELIN’ MAD!

I’M ALWAYS SEEIN’ COUPLES,
IT MAKES ME UPSET.
NOT HAVING NO GIRLS EVER MAKES ME FORM TEARS!

WHERE IS SHE?
THE ONE FOR ME.
WHERE IS SHE?
SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME!

I DON’T KNOW ANY GIRL WHO LIKES ME.
WHY NOT?
WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?
HOW CAN I LIKE MYSELF WHEN NO ONE ELSE DOES?
IT’S WHY I’M CONSTANTLY CHANGING MY STYLE,
CONSTANTLY CHANGING MY WAYS,
THINKING TO MYSELF, “IT’LL BE HOW THE GIRLS WOULD PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME.”
BUT I AIN’T GETTIN’ NO ATTENTION AT ALL!
GETTIN’ NO ATTENTION FROM NO ONE!

ALL I GET IS LOOKS OF HATE.
LOOKS OF DISGUST.
ALL I GET IS GIRLS BEING RUDE.
BEING SNOBBISH, NEVER NICE.

I NEVER SEE A GIRL WHO LIKES ME.
NONE NEVER SHOW IT.
IF A GIRL LIKED ME, WOULDN’T THEY LET ME KNOW IT?

MAYBE SOMEDAY I’LL FIND YOU.
I HOPE SOMEDAY SOON.
WHEN WILL I FIND YOU?
I JUST WISH THAT I KNEW!

LOST, LONELY, CONFUSED (DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO)

 

THEY SAY THERE’S SOMEONE OUT THERE FOR EVERYBODY
WHERE IS SHE?

WHY DO I FEEL SO ALONE
IN THIS MIXED UP WORLD?

IN MY MIND, FEEL I CHEATED LOVE TWICE OR 3 TIMES
DID I REALLY?

WERE THEY JUST FRIENDS?
OR DID THEY REALLY WANT TO TAKE IT FURTHER?

NEVER KNEW MANY GIRLS,
AND THE ONES I KNEW I ALWAYS HAD A CRUSH ON
(DON’T ASK ME WHY)

I GUESS ‘CAUSE I DON’T AND NEVER HAD ANYONE,
AND I WANT SOMEONE!
IT’S ALL I EVER THINK ABOUT THESE DAYS!

I PRAY MAYBE SOMEDAY THAT I MAY FIND HER.
I DON’T KNOW WHERE.
I DON’T KNOW WHEN.
SHOULD I GO BACK TO THE GIRLS IN MY PAST,
OR FIND THOSE IN MY FUTURE?

JUST DON’T KNOW HOW SHOULD I BE FEELING.
NEVER HAPPY, ALWAYS GLOOMY.

MIND IS SO MESSED UP
SO IS MY LIFE

WHAT TO DO.
WHAT SHOULD I DO?
MY GOD, I’M SO CONFUSED!

SO LOST, LONELY, AND CONFUSED
I JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

LONER’S WORLD

 

EVERY DAY, ALL ALONE
EVERY DAY, NO ONE AROUND
EVERY DAY, BY MYSELF

THE ONLY PERSON I HANG OUT WITH IS MY OWN SHADOW!

NOBODY TO LOVE,
NO ONE TO CARE FOR.
JUST SPENDING MY LIFE CARING FOR MYSELF.

ALL THOSE DAMN CLIQUES FORCE ME TO SIT BY MYSELF
ALL THESE DAMN CLIQUES FORCE ME TO BE ALONE

NOT MANY TO HAVE A DECENT CONVO WITH,
SO I JUST CONVO WITH MYSLEF.

SPENDING MY LIFE JUST CONVERSATIN’ WITH THOSE A GEN
      OR TWO OLDER!

LIKE TO PARTY,
END UP PARTYING BY MYSELF.
LOVE MOVIES,
DON’T EVER GO TO THE THEATER BECAUSE I DON’T WANT
      TO BY MYSELF.
LOVE MUSIC,
END UP ENJOYING IT BY MYSELF!

I HEAR ABOUT PARTIES ALL THE TIME,
AND THEY JUST PASS ME BY WITHOUT INVITIN’ ME!
HEY, IT’S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS!

LEARNING HOW TO DRIVE AIN’T GONNA HELP
I REFUSE TO GO PLACES WITHOUT THE COMPANY
SO I’LL STILL END UP STAYING HOME!

DYING TO MEET PEOPLE MY OWN AGE,
BUT NONE WANT A THING TO DO WITH ME,
AND NONE HARDLY KNOW ME AT ALL!

EVERY DAY, NO ONE AROUND EXCEPT FOR ME AND MY
      SHADOW!

DEPRESSED, MISERABLE, ANGRY AS HELL.
HOW ELSE SHOULD I FEEL WHEN I AIN’T GETTING’ WHAT
    I DISERVE, WHAT I NEED?

I WAS FORCED INTO THIS DAMNED LONER’S WORLD,
AND IT AIN’T HEALTHY FOR ME.
UNHAPPY, MISERABLE, DEPRESSED!

I WANT OUT OF THIS LONER’S WORLD!

SOMEONE GET ME OUT!

TIRED PART 2

 

TIRED OF NOT BEING FINANCIALLY STABLE

TIRED OF WORKING FROM PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK NEVER MAKING ENOUGH TO SAVE

TIRED OF BEING SO POOR I’M STUCK HERE WHERE I CAN’T MEET PEOPLE AND DON’T KNOW ANYONE IF THEY DON’T WORK AT WAL-MART

TIRED OF BEING BROKE

TIRED OF NEVER HAVING MONEY SO I CAN MOVE

TIRED OF WANTING TO JUST SLEEP BECAUSE OF NOTHING ELSE BETTER TO DO ALWAYS ALONE, SO WHY SHOULD I CARE?

TIRED OF NOT HAVING GONE ANYWHERE IN MY MUSIC CAREER

TIRED OF BEING POOR

TIRED OF THE ONLY SOCIAL LIFE I GET IS ONLINE

TIRED OF ALWAYS TRYING TO HAVE FUN ALONE

TIRED OF GETTING DRUNK BUT I GOT NOTHING ELSE BETTER TO DO

TIRED OF WORKING DAY BY DAY NEVER GETTING NO WHERE I SHOULD BE

TIRED OF NEVER HAVING ANY FUN

TIRED OF NEVER BEING IN LOVE

TIRED OF MUSIC BEING THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME ALIVE

TIRED OF MUSIC AND TV BEING THE ONLY THING TO KEEP ME FROM SUICIDE

TIRED OF NOT HAVING A LIFE

TIRED OF BEING IGNORED BY 95% OF THE PEOPLE I SEE

TIRED OF HAVING A PHONE WHEN ONLY PHONE SOLICITORS CALL

TIRED OF PLAYING MUSIC THAT NO ONE HEARS

TIRED OF LIVING IN HARRISON, ARKANSAS, WHERE THE ONLY THING THERE IS TO DO IS GO TO WAL-MART

TIRED OF PEOPLE GIVING ME A DIRTY LOOK WHEN THEY DON’T EVEN KNOW ME

TIRED OF PEOPLE NOT INVITING ME ANYWHERE BECAUSE THEY CAN’T STAND ME WHEN THEY GOT NO REASON TO HATE ME

TIRED OF DOING EVERYTHING BY MYSELF

TIRED OF MY PARENTS NOT WANTING TO HELP, THEY CLAIM THEY WILL BUT THEY WON’T

(THEY ARE ONE REASON I HAVEN’T TRIED TO TAKE THE WRITTEN TEST FOR DRIVER’S LICENSE IN SO LONG, THEY SAY THEY’D HELP ME STUDY, I FELL FOR IT TWICE.  NEVER AGAIN!)

PEOPLE OFFER TO HELP ME STUDY BUT I AIN’T GOT TIME TO DO THAT AT WORK!

TIRED OF LIVING IN THIS LONER’S WORLD

TIRED OF DISAGREEMENT OF MY LIFESTYLE 100%

TIRED OF THE ONLY FRIENDS I GOT NOT HAVING ANY TIME FOR ME

TIRED OF ALWAYS BEING SO PISSED AND MISERABLE BECAUSE OF THE SITUATION I’M LIVING IN

TIRED OF ALWAYS COMPLAININ’ BUT I AIN’T HAD A REASON TO BE HAPPY

TIRED OF NEVER BEING HAPPY

TIRED OF BEING PISSED AT THIS WORLD

TIRED OF LIVING SUCH A MISERABLE LIFE

TIRED OF PEOPLE COMMITTING CRIMES AGAINST ME, NEXT THING I KNOW SOMEONE MAY KILL ME

TIRED OF LIVING UNHAPPY

TIRED OF LIVING PERIOD

TIRED OF LIVING MISERABLE

TIRED OF LIVING

BETTER OFF DEAD

HOW WOULD A PERSON NOT SUICIDAL COMMIT IT?

TIRED OF NO ONE TRYING TO HELP ME MUCH

TIRED OF THE GIRLS NEVER TAKING AN INTEREST IN ME BECAUSE OF THE WAY I LOOK

TIRED OF THE GIRLS NOT BEING INTERESTED BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW ME

TIRED OF PEOPLE NEVER GETTING TO KNOW ME SO THEY JUST IGNORE ME INSTEAD

TIRED OF BEING CALLED GAY OR QUEER WHEN I’M 100% STRAIGHT, ONLY DIFFERENCE IS I’M NOT LIKE MOST GUYS

TIRED OF PLAYING MY GUITAR AND NEVER GOING ANYWHERE WITH IT

TIRED OF NOT HAVING ANYONE TO GO TO FOR HELP THAT CAN HELP ME

TIRED OF HAVING TO GO HOME AFTER WORK AND STAYING HOME ON MY DAYS OFF

TIRED OF NEVER MEETING NOBODY

WANTING TO MOVE BACK TO PHOENIX, BUT HOW COULD I?  I’M TOO DAMN BROKE!

TIRED OF NOT PLAYING ANY GIGS

TIRED OF COMMITTING SINS (BUT IT’S THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS ME AWAY FROM BOREDOM’S WAY)

TIRED OF NOT HAVING TRUST IN GOD (I GAVE HIM A CHANCE THE 4 YEARS I LIVED IN FT. SMITH, AND MY PROBLEMS JUST GOT WORSE MOVING HERE).  HE SHOULD HELP WHEN A PERSON ASKS FOR HELP, NOT MAKE THEM WAIT.  IT’S WHY SO MANY TURN TO SUICIDE

WISH I COULD GO BACK IN TIME AND START OVER, BUT I CAN’T.

TIRED OF HAVING A DAILY SCHEDULE THAT NEVER CHANGES

TIRED OF KNOWING WHAT I’M DOING TOMORROW BECAUSE I KNOW IT’S THE SAME THING I’M DOING TODAY AND EVERY DAY.

TIRED OF WORRYING AND WONDERING WHERE MY LIFE IS HEADED

TIRED OF KNOWING HOW HATEFUL I MAY BE IN MY 50s

TIRED OF GIRLS DOING THINGS TO MAKE ME THINK THEY’D LIKE TO HAVE ME AS A BOYFRIEND, BUT REALLY THEY DON’T

TIRED OF GIRLS MESSING WITH MY MIND

TIRED OF PEOPLE LOOKING AT ME LIKE I DIDN’T GET A JOKE BECAUSE THEY HAD TO REPEAT IT, AND THAN CALLING ME, “STUPID.” SAYING, “I DIDN’T GET IT” WHEN REALLY I DID

TIRED OF WRITING SUCH DEPRESSING AND MISERABLE POEMS AND SONGS

TIRED OF KNOWING THAT MY SONGS AND POEMS WON’T GET ME A #1 HIT

TIRED OF NEVER BEING INVITED TO PARTIES

TIRED OF TELLING CUSTOMERS THAT I GREET, “I’D BE BETTER IF I WERE SOMEWHERE ELSE!”  BUT IT’S THE TRUTH

TIRED OF NEVER HAVING A GIRL AROUND TO BE IN LOVE WITH

TIRED OF BEING A LONER, I DON’T AGREE WITH IT

TIRED OF GOING TO WORK AND JUST COMPLAININ’ ABOUT EVERYTHING

TIRED OF NOT BEING LIKED BY MANY

TIRED OF MISSING OUT ON EVENTS IN MY LIFE (WHAT EVENTS?  THERE AREN’T ANY)

TIRED OF ALWAYS WEARING A FROWN BECAUSE I’M NEVER HAPPY

TIRED OF PEOPLE ALWAYS BUGGIN’

TIRED OF NEVER TRUSTING ANYONE

TIRED OF BEING IN MENTAL PAIN

TIRED OF HARDLY SMILING

TIRED OF MY PARENTS THINKING I’M GAY BECAUSE I DON’T AND NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND.  HOW COULD I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND IN THE FIRST PLACE IF NO GIRL SEEMS INTERESTED, AND LOOK AWAY INSTEAD?

TIRED OF MY PARENTS MAKING FUN OF ME BECAUSE OF MY CHOICE OF CLOTHES

TIRED OF MY DAD MAKING RUDE COMMENTS BECAUSE OF MY GOALS IN LIFE WEREN’T LIKE HIS

TIRED OF MY PARENTS MAKING RUDE AND STUPID COMMENTS WHEN I TELL THEM PERSONAL STUFF, WHICH IS WHY I NEVER TELL THEM

TIRED OF CELEBRATING THE HOLIDAYS.  WHAT’S THE POINT?  CHRISTMAS IS JUST SPENT AROUND FAMILY MEMBERS I CAN’T STAND, BIRTHDAYS I SPEND BY MYSELF NO BIRTHDAY PARTY SET UP FOR ME, VALENTINE’S DAY, NO ONE I LOVE LIKE THAT SO WHAT’S THE POINT TO CELEBRATE?  DESTROY ALL THE HEARTS, ROSES, AND LOVEY-DOVEY CRAP!  EASTER IS JUST ANOTHER REGULAR SUNDAY.  JUST ANOTHER DAY TO BE HATEFUL.

TIRED OF JUST BEING THIS MISERABLE

TIRED OF LIVING IN A TOWN WHERE THE ONLY WAY TO MEET PEOPLE IS AT WORK, SCHOOL, OR CHURCH WHEN I JUST GO TO WORK

TIRED OF NO ONE WANTING TO HANG WITH ME, WHEN I AM A COOL PERSON TO HANG OUT WITH TOO

TIRED OF GIRLS NEVER WANTING TO MEET ME, WHEN I AM AN INTERESTING GUY TO BE AROUND.

GUESS I’M JUST TOO DAMN TIRED.  WHEN WILL IT END?  SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE IT END!

DEPRESSION PART 2

TIRED OF BEING ALONE
TIRED OF SPENDING ALL MY DAYS BY MYSELF

IF I KEEP GOING THIS ROUTE I’M LIABLE TO HANG MYSELF

ALWAYS MISERABLE
ALWAYS DEPRESSED
MY LIFE IS SUCH A MESS

I FEEL THAT I JUST GOT TO PROTEST AGAINST THOSE WHO WANT TO IGNORE ME, WHO WANT TO HATE ME

NOWHERE TO GO SO I JUST GO HOME AND STAY IN MY OWN ZONE
WHEN THE PHONE RINGS, IT’S ALWAYS THOSE DAMN SOLICITORS
WHEN SOMEONE KNOCKS ON MY DAMN DOOR,
IT’S ALWAYS THOSE DAMN SOLICITORS!

NO ONE TO TALK TO
SO I JUST TALK TO MYSELF

EVERY DAY I SIT AND I CRY WONDERING WHEN WILL IT EVER CHANGE?
HATE MY LIFE!
FEEL I JUST WANT TO DIE
BUT I DON’T WANNA TURN TO SUICIDE FOR MY ANSWERS
BUT WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?
I GET SO DAMN CONFUSED!

NO ONE TO HARDLY HAVE A DECENT CONVO WITH, JUST “HI AND BYE”

I’LL ADMIT TO NOT CONVERSIN’ MUCH WHEN GIVEN A CHANCE BUT I NEVER CAN THINK OF STUFF TO KEEP A LONG CONVO WITH AND I DON’T WANNA STAND AROUND ACTIN’ A FOOL, WHAT’S A PERSON TO DO?

I PLAY MUSIC, BUT NO ONE EVER COMES OVER TO HEAR, SO I JUDGE MY SOUND MYSELF

IT AIN’T FAIR
OTHERS GOT PEOPLE AROUND A LOT
BUT IF I’M NOT AT WORK, I’M BY MYSELF

PISSED AT IT, SICK OF IT
TELL ME WHAT SHOULD I DO TO CHANGE THIS?

WHERE’S MY LIFE BEEN?

 

WHERE’S MY LIFE BEEN?
WHERE IS IT GOING?
BORN IN 1980,
NOW I’M 22
TRYIN’ NOT TO REMEMBER ’89 TO ‘92
BUT IT’S HARD TO
WHEN THAT’S AS FAR BACK AS I CAN REMEMBER

WAS TORTURED GROWING UP AS A KID
KIDS DIDN’T KNOW OR UNDERSTAND ME
SO THEY JUST REJECTED ME
TRIED TO BAN ME
SHAPING ME THE WAY I BECAME TODAY

VERY SHY, VERY QUIET, NOT EASY TO MEET PEOPLE, NON-QUIET AROUND THOSE I KNOW
NEVER EASY FOR ME TO MEET PEOPLE,
ALWAYS HARD FOR ME.
NO MATTER HOW HARD I CHANGE MY WAYS OF SOCIALIZATION, MY PROBLEMS OF PEERS IN THE PAST JUST COME BACK TO HAUNT ME.
HOW SAD!

NEVER BEEN IN LOVE BEFORE
AND WILL I EVER?
DAYS GOING BY TOO FAST,
WISH THEY’D JUST SLOW DOWN
BECAUSE MY LIFE IS JUST PASSIN’ ME BY
MY LIFE IS BEIN WASTED AS WE SPEAK.
NEVER HAPPY, ALWAYS SAD.
NEED TO CHANGE IT BUT I WISH I KNEW HOW
22 YEARS OLD AND NOWHERE I’M S’POSED TO BE
WHAT A LIFE I LIVE!

TOO MUCH TIME SPENT AT HOME ALONE

 

THIS IS BAD –
IT’S ENOUGH TO MAKE ME FEEL EVEN WORSE
IT’S ENOUGH TO MAKE ME FEEL EVEN MORE DEPRESSED,
I’M FED UP!

THERE’S 168 HOURS IN A WEEK
40 SPENT AT WORK, 6 SPENT AT PARENTS’
THE OTHER 122 IS SPENT AT HOME ALONE
WHAT’S THE PURPOSE IN ME EVEN HAVING A PHONE?

SO LONELY
ALWAYS BY MYSELF
WHAT AM I TO DO?
BECAUSE OF THIS I FEEL SO UNCOOL
I KNOW I AIN’T DULL BUT I FEEL MY LIFE IS
BECAUSE HARDLY ANYONE PAY ATTENTION TO ME LIKE THEY SHOULD.

SICK OF ALWAYS BEING ALONE
I’M JUST GETTING WORSE BY THE WEEK
BETTER OFF TOO MOVE – BUT I’M TOO DAMN BROKE
WHAT ELSE IS THERE FOR ME TO DO?

BORED

ALWAYS ALL ALONE

NO ONE TO BE AROUND

I’D RATHER BE SOMEWHERE ELSE

NEVER HAPPY

ALWAYS SAD

NEVER GLAD

ALWAYS MAD

ALWAYS ALL DEPRESSED

NO ONE TO HANG AROUND

I’D RATHER BE IN ANOTHER PLACE

NEVER HAPPY

ALWAYS SAD

NEVER GLAD

ALWAYS MAD

ALWAYS MISERABLE

NO ONE IS EVER AROUND

RATHER BE IN ANOTHER PLACE

ALWAYS SAD

ALWAYS MISERABLE

ALWAYS DEPRESSED

ALWAYS LONELY

QUIT GRIPING AT THE 3RD SHIFT PEOPLE GREETER

 

WHAT’S THIS PLACE’S PROBLEM?
OVERNIGHT BY THE DOOR, WHAT’S THERE TO DO?
NO ONE COMES IN.
NO ONE GOES OUT!

CAN’T SIT,
CAN’T READ
CAN’T DO NOTHIN’ WITHOUT SOMEONE GETTIN’ RUDE OVER IT!

I GREET ALL THE CUSTOMERS.
I GREET ALL THE PEOPLE THAT GO THROUGH THE DOORS.
SO WHY SHOULD IT MATTER?

THEY EXPECT YOU TO JUST WALK UP AND DOWN THE CARPET DOING NOTHING BUT LOOKIN’ LIKE A FOOL!

WASH WINDOWS?
THEY DON’T PAY ME ENOUGH TO BE A JANITOR! 
I’M NOT PAID ENOUGH TO DO SOMEONE ELSE’S JOB,
I’M NOT PAID ENOUGH TO EVEN HELP THOSE WHO JUST IGNORE ME!

I’M PAID TO WATCH THE DOOR, PUSH CARTS, AND PICK UP TRASH
(NOT EVEN PAID ENOUGH TO DO THAT)
I AT LEAST DO MY JOB AND MAKE SURE IT’S DONE BY 6:30
SO WHY CAN’T THEY LEAVE ME ALONE,
AND STOP BUGGIN’?

REJECTED PART 2

 

MY LIFE –
GO HOME, SLEEP, GO TO WORK
THAT’S MY EVERY DAY ROUTINE.

DON’T GOT A SOCIAL LIFE
UNLESS I GO ONLINE
WHY ARE PEOPLE SO MEAN?

THEY AREN’T HATEFUL,
THEY JUST LIKE TO IGNORE YOU.
YOU’RE NOT PART OF THERE CLIQUE SO THEY REJECT YOU.

SO I HARDLY HAVE ANYBODY TO HANG WITH, IF SO NOT EVEN TWO.

THERE’S ONE GIRL I LIKE HERE,
BUT I DON’T THINK SHE LIKES ME THAT WAY, CAN’T ASK HER, ‘FRAID I’D GET REJECTED ONCE MORE!

THE ONLY GIRL I KNOW WHO LIKES ME THAT WAY
(I LIKE HER TOO)
LIVES IN PHOENIX, AND THERE’S NO TELLING WHEN I BE ABLE TO GO BACK THERE.

WHEN I DRINK, I DRINK ALONE
NO ONE ELSE WILL DRINK WITH ME.
WHAT’S THE POINT, WHAT’S THE USE?
I DRINK EVERY DAY, BUT WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO DO?
SO I DRINK TO ESCAPE FROM BOREDOM

SPEND EVERY DAY BY MYSELF
WATCH MOVIES BY MYSELF
ENJOY MUSIC BY MYSELF
PLAY MUSIC FOR MYSELF
HOW CAN A PERSON ENJOY LIFE WHEN THEY ALWAYS SPENDING IT BY THEMSELVES?

EVERY DAY I FEEL REJECTED.
I FEEL NO ONE REALLY WANTS TO BE AROUND ME, OR ME AROUND THEM.
THEY WALK BY AND JUST IGNORE MY ASS LIKE I DON’T EXIST OR SUMTHIN’.
NO WONDER I FEEL SO REJECTED.

AND IF THEY REALLY WANNA BE MY FRIEND THEY AIN’T TRYIN’ HARD ENOUGH SO I JUST START FEELING REJECTED.

BEAUTY

Beauty is found in girls,

girls with blonde hair I grow fond of!

Girls with brown hair don't make me frown!

I like all different kinds of girls

that's why I have a ball,

that's why I wanna fall in love with one

so I can have some fun!

Beauty is found in girls

that make me whirl to stare!

Beauty is found in girls

that I think are so hot,

so they're on top of my list!

Beauty is found in girls!

Go away, faggots, because beauty is

found in girls!

That make me stare!

Beauty is found in girls!

CONFUSED

I’M SO CONFUSED.

I FEEL GOD IS TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING

BUT IT’S REALLY HARD TO TELL.

I FEEL HE’S SAYING HE WANTS ME BACK IN PHOENIX,

BUT DOES HE REALLY?

I FEEL HE WANTS ME TO BE WITH THIS GIRL THERE.

BUT DOES HE REALLY?

THAT GIRL HASN’T BEEN ONLINE TO TALK TO FOR 2 WEEKS.

IS HE TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING ELSE?

I FEEL HE WANTS ME TO HELP THE VICTIMS OF LAST YEAR’S TERROR ATTACKS.

BUT BY DOING WHAT?

I FEEL HE WANTS ME IN MUSIC.

BUT DOING WHAT?

I CAN’T SING A NOTE,

AND I’M NOT AS GIFTED AS DYLAN OR CLAPTON OR LENNON.

I JUST KNOW A LOT ABOUT MUSIC,

KNOW A HIT SONG, AND HAVE A LOVE AND PASSION FOR IT.

I’M SO CONFUSED.

WHAT IS GOD REALLY TRYING TO TELL ME?

HE’S GOT A PLAN FOR EVERYONE.

BUT WHAT IS MINE?

YOU WON’T SUCCEED AT ALL

(Note: on the 1st anniversary of 9/11 I wrote this song as a Patriotic song to tell Osama Bin Laden that he would never succeed in destroying America.)

YOU CAN DESTROY BUILDINGS OF GREAT POWER
YOU CAN DESTROY BUILDINGS OF GREAT ARCHITECTURE
YOU CAN TRY TO DESTROY OUR SPIRITS
YOU CAN TRY AND TAKE OUR FREEDOM AWAY
YOU MAY SUCCEED IN TWO –
BUT YOU WILL NOT SUCCEED IN ALL.
NO – YOU WILL NOT SUCCEED IN ALL!

YOU TRIED TO DESTROY OUR SPIRITS.
YOU TRIED TO BRING THIS COUNTRY DOWN.
YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD IN DESTROYING THE WORLD TRADE CENTER.
YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD IN DESTROYING THE PENTAGON
YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD BY WANTING TO DESTROY D.C.
BUT YOU DIDN’T SUCCEED AT ALL.
NO – YOU DIDN’T SUCCEED AT ALL!

(SPOKEN:)
MR. BIN LADEN, KISS MY WHITE AMERICAN ASS!!!

OSAMA BIN LADEN – SUCH A COWARD.
OSAMA BIN LADEN – SUCH A FOOL.
OSAMA BIN LADEN – SO FULL OF HATRED.
OSAMA BIN LADEN – SO CRUEL.
HE TRIED TO DESTROY US ON 9/11/01
BUT HE DIDN’T SUCCEED AT ALL.
NO – HE DIDN’T SUCCEED AT ALL!

OSAMA BIN LADEN – SO STUPID!
THOUGHT THAT AMERICA WAS ABOUT MONEY AND POWER.
THOUGHT THAT AMERICA WAS ABOUT RICHES AND FAME.
WHEN AMERICA IS REALLY ALL ABOUT SPIRIT AND FREEDOM.
OSAMA BIN LADEN – NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY
YOU CAN’T DESTROY THAT.
NO – YOU CAN’T DESTROY THAT.
YOU’LL NEVER BRING THIS COUNTRY DOWN.

DEDICATED TO HEROES OF 9/11

 

YOU CHANGED EVERYBODY’S VIEWS OF HEROES LAST 9/11
BEFORE THAN WE ALL LOOKED UP TO CELEBRITIES
WE ALL LOOKED UP TO MOVIE ACTORS,
MUSICIANS, STARS.
BEFORE THAN WE ALL LOOKED UP TO
CHARACTERS IN MOVIES AND ON TV.
BEFORE THAN WE NEVER KNEW WHO A REAL HERO WAS.
BEFORE THAN WE REALLY DIDN’T KNOW.

YOU SPENT ALL HOURS OF THE DAY TRYING TO HELP THE VICTIMS.
SACRIFICING YOUR OWN LIVES SO THAT OTHERS WILL LIVE.
NYPD, FDNY, PAPD AND THOSE ON FLIGHT 93 –
IF THAT AIN’T WHAT TRUE HEROISM IS,
THEN THERE AIN’T NO SUCH THING.
NO, THERE AIN’T NO SUCH THING.

YOU ALL HELPED THOSE WHO WERE IN TIME OF NEED.
A LOT OF YOU SACRIFICED YOUR LIVES
SO THAT OTHERS WILL SURVIVE – LIVE.
PROUD OF YOU.
PROUD OF YOU ALL.
IF NOT FOR YOU,
THAN WHERE WOULD WE BE TODAY?
HOW WOULD WE FEEL?
TO THE HEROES OF 9/11,
THANK YOU.

BIG CITY LIFE

Suburbs all around you.

Sidewalks all around you.

City Streets every where you go.

City boundaries no where in sight.

People all around you.

Public transportation everywhere you turn

Every where all types of people.

Every where all types of businesses.

Every where all types of homes.

Every where no country life in site.

Down town, big buildings everywhere

All kinds of night life everywhere.

All kinds of things to do.

All kinds of ways to get around

You can see the neon lights from a mile away

You look up towards the sky, and see

Over 30 commercial jets.

Look up, you see the city’s tallest buildings.

The city can have 3 to 4 freeways all to itself (Maybe more.)

You can drive over 10 miles, and still have a

Ways to go to leave the city!

Growing up in the city may be rough and hard, but it’s

Better than being raised up in the country.

Never have to be at home.

Places to go and things to do.

Sidewalks to walk or ride a bike on

Zillion malls to go.

Zillion clubs, movie theaters.

When you think the city stops growing, it grows 2 million more,

New businesses come in, and new suburbs.

More people move in and all the empty land becomes

Home to more housing developments!

You’d think I’d hate to go back and wouldn’t think about it.

But I’d die to go back and can’t wait for the day that I do!

DON’T NEED TO BE

DON’T NEED TO BE HERE IN THIS STORE
DON’T NEED TO BE HERE IN THIS CITY
DON’T NEED TO BE HERE IN THIS STATE

DON’T NEED TO BE BROKE
DON’T NEED TO BE POOR
DON’T NEED TO BE FEELIN’ HURT
DON’T NEED TO BE FEELIN’ SOAR
DON’T NEED TO BE FEELIN’ PAIN

I NEED TO BE IN THE MUSIC BUSINESS
I NEED TO BE IN PHOENIX
I NEED TO BE IN ARIZONA

I NEED TO BE RICH
I NEED TO HAVE FAME
I NEED TO SHOW THE JERKS HOW AND WHO  I BECAME
I NEED TO FEEL LOVE
AND I THINK I’D HAVE IT BACK IN PHOENIX, ARIZONA!

Tired

 

TIRED OF ALWAYS BEIN’ ALONE
TIRED OF NOT HAVING A LIFE
TIRED OF NOT HAVING A SOCIAL LIFE
TIRED OF BEING IN ARKANSAS
TIRED OF BEING BROKE
TIRED OF BEING POOR
TIRED OF BEING IGNORED
TIRED OF NEVER HANGING OUT
TIRED OF LIVING A LIFE THAT’S SO PACKED FULL OF LIES
TIRED OF NEVER HAVING ANY MONEY
TIRED OF NOT BEING ABLE TO GO ANYWHERE
TIRED OF NOT BEING BACK IN ARIZONA
TIRED OF MY LIFE JUST PASSING ME BY
TIRED OF NOT HAVING ANY FRIENDS
TIRED OF ALWAYS BEING UNHAPPY
TIRED OF NEVER BEING HAPPY
TIRED OF 2ND SHIFT LEAVING ME SUCH A MESS
TIRED OF LIVING
BECAUSE I’M LIVING A LIFE OF DEPRESSION AND BOREDOM
I FEEL I WANT TO DIE
BECAUSE I’M FEELING JUST WAY TOO TIRED OF LIVING
A NON-HAPPY LIFE!
A NON-LIVING LIFE!
TIRED OF LIVING A SAD AND DEPRESSED LIFE!

ALONE

EVERY DAY I GET OFF WORK I GO HOME.

THERE AIN’T NOBODY THERE.

I FEEL LIKE NOBODY CARES.

IT REALLY AIN’T FAIR!

EVERY DAY I FEEL ALL ALONE!

THE ONLY PEOPLE I’M AROUND IS WHO I WORK WITH.

MOST OF THEM IGNORE ME.

I FEEL LIKE NOBODY CARES FOR ME.

IT REALLY AIN’T FAIR TO ME!

EVERY DAY I FEEL ALL ALONE!

THE FOOLS THROW PARTIES AND NEVER BOTHER INVITING ME.

THEY ALL JUST IGNORE ME.

NONE OF THEM REALLY WANT ME AROUND!

IT AIN’T FAIR AT ALL!

EVERY DAY I FEEL ALL ALONE!

AIN’T GOT MANY FRIENDS.

NO ONE WANTS TO TRY.

EVERY DAY I FEEL I GOT TO CRY!

THEY’D RATHER BE FRIENDS WITH OTHERS.

HOW UNFAIR!

EVERY DAY I FEEL ALL ALONE!

NO ONE EVEN CALLS ME ON THE PHONE.

WASTE OF MONEY TO EVEN HAVE!

THE ONLY FRIENDS I HAVE IS VERY FEW

HARDLY HANG OUT, AND MOST 20 TO 30 YEARS OLDER.

WHY IS IT THAT I FEEL SO ALONE?

ALONE AND NOWHERE TO EVEN GO.

ALONE AND NOWHERE TO GO BUT HOME!

SO ALONE, I FEEL I SHOULD THROW OUT MY PHONE!

SO ALONE I WROTE SO MANY DEPRESSING POEMS!

EVERY DAY I FEEL SO ALONE!

I NEED TO GET OUT OF ARKANSAS.

I NEED TO GO BACK TO PHOENIX.

I FEEL I WON’T BE ALONE THAN.

I FEEL THAT GOD SAID SO.

BUT UNTIL THAT DAY COME –

I’LL BE FEELIN’ ALL ALONE!

ALL ALONE, EVERY DAY.

SO I JUST END UP BACK HOME.

NO PARTIES, NO FRIENDS TO GO TO,

SO I JUST GO HOME, FEELING ALL ALONE!

I LOVE YOU, MARY

 

BACK IN ’95 WAS WHEN WE FIRST MET.
YOU SAT NEXT TO ME IN CLASS
AND STARTED TALKING TO ME.
YOU WERE SO SWEET AND CUTE.

I CAN’T BELIEVE I FINALLY GOT IN TOUCH WITH YOU AGAIN!
AND YOU STILL SOUND AS SWEET AS EVER!
TO THIS DAY I STILL THINK ABOUT YOU.
I WISHED I ASKED YOU OUT BACK THAN,
BUT I NEVER DID!
I WAS TOO SHY, AND I STILL AM.

I CHEATED LOVE, BUT I GOT A SECOND CHANCE.
I DON’T WANT TO BLOW IT AGAIN!
I WISH I WAS BACK IN PHOENIX RIGHT NOW
HOLDING YOUR HAND, AND
LOVING YOU AS MUCH AS I CAN.
MARY, I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL.
I WANT TO LOVE YOU TILL WE GROW OLD.
LOVE YOU UNTIL THE DAY I DIE.
WHEN NOT AROUND YOU, I JUST WANT TO CRY!

I THINK ABOUT EVERY DAY.
PLEASE TELL ME IF THAT’S OK?
I’M THINKING ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW AS I WRITE THIS.
I JUST WISH I KNEW THE RIGHT WORDS TO SAY.
PLEASE TELL ME IF THIS POEM IS OK.

I KNOW I MAY SOUND SILLY BECAUSE I STILL HARDLY KNOW YOU,
BUT SOMETHING TOLD ME YOU’RE THE ONE FOR ME.
I THINK MAYBE IT WAS GOD.

I THINK GOD WAS ALSO TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING
LAST FALL, BUT I JUST DIDN’T LISTEN.
LAST FALL AN EX-FRIEND COMMITTED CREDIT CARD FRAUD
WITH MY CARD.
SO I KNOW GOD WAS TRYING TO TELL ME
NOT TO GO BACK TO FORT SMITH.
EVER SINCE THAN, I’VE BEEN WANTING TO GO BACK TO PHOENIX!

NOW WITH ALL THE SIGNS I’VE BEEN SEEING,
I BELIEVE IT EVEN MORE, AND I BELIEVE IN GOD EVEN MORE.
I KNOW WHERE GOD WANTS ME TO BE, AND I NEED TO GO THERE.

HE WANTS ME TO BE BACK IN PHOENIX WITH YOU!
MARY HODGES, YOU’RE THE ONLY GIRL I THINK ABOUT,
AND I LOVE YOU!
I TRULY LOVE YOU!
I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!!!!

A MESSAGE TO GOD

(written during what I’d like to call my “Great Depression”)

DEAR GOD,

WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY LIFE?

WHAT AM I PAYING THE PRICE FOR?

DON’T FEEL I SHOULD BE HERE NO MORE.

MY LIFE IS SCREWED

BECAUSE PEOPLE CAN BE SO CRUEL.

SOMETIMES I FEEL IT’S GOTTA BE THROUGH.

BUT I DON’T WANNA END IT.

SO I JUST GOTTA LIVE IT.

I DO BELIEVE IN YOU,

BUT IT’S GETTING HARD TO.

I FEEL I LOST MY FAITH IN YOU.

THOSE YEARS I WENT TO CHURCH, I PRAYED FOR HELP

AND I NEVER GOT ANY.

THEY SAY YOU HELP WHEN YOU READY TO.

BUT WHAT IF SOMEONE IS IN DESPERATE NEED?

PLEASE HEAR MY PLEA!

DEAR GOD,

IF YOU OUT THERE, PLEASE!

I’M DOWN ON MY KNEES, BEGGIN’

PLEASE, PLEASE, HELP ME!

I CHEATED LOVE

 

I FEEL I CHEATED LOVE.
I WISH I SHOULDN’T’VE.
WHY DO I FEEL I CHEATED LOVE?

I WISH I COULD GO BACK TO ’95, WHY?
THERE WAS A GURL I MET BACK IN SCHOOL.
GOD, I FEEL LIKE SUCH A FOOL.
SHE SEEMED TO BE VERY COOL. 
WHY WAS I A FOOL?

SHE SEEMED TO BE REAL SWEET.
SHE DIDN’T ACT LIKE A TEASE.
SHE WAS REAL CUTE,
I MISS LOOKIN’ AT HER
GOD, SHE WAS CUTE!

NOW I’M 22.
I WISH THAT I KNEW HOW I COULD FIND HER
BUT I’M LOOKIN’
AND HOPIN’ THAT MAYBE WE’LL GET TOGETHER.

MY PARENTS ARE CONFUSED

 

MY DAD SAYS I’M CONFUSED
JUST BECAUSE HE PAYS MORE ATTENTION TO THE NEWS
BUT I DO KNOW THAT HE’S THE ONE MORE CONFUSED.
HE LOOKS AT ME AND HE JUST LAUGHS.
I THINK IT HAS TO DO WITH HIS BOOZE!
HE LOOKS AT ME AND ACTS LIKE HE’S
WISER JUST BECAUSE HE’S OLDER!
HE MAY BE MY FATHER, BUT I DO
THINK HE’S STUPID AT TIMES!
HE REALLY DON’T KNOW AS MUCH AS HE CLAIMS HE DO!
HE ACTS LIKE A FOOL!

MY MOM SAYS I DRESS WEIRD
JUST BECAUSE I DON’T DRESS LIKE HER.
I THINK THAT SHE’S THE ONE WHO DRESSES WEIRD.
SHE LOOKS AT ME AND SHE JUST LAUGHS.
SOMETIMES I FEEL THAT SHE’S CONFUSED.
IN HER CAR I TURN ON MY MUSIC,
SHE CAN’T EVEN TOLERATE IT, PUTS IT ON COUNTRY!
SHE MAY BE MY MOTHER, BUT I DO
THINK SHE’S WEIRD AT TIMES.

BOTH MY PARENTS NEVER RAISED ME ON MY LEVEL.
KEPT A LOT OF SHIT FROM ME.
I LEARNED ALL MY SHIT FROM THE STREETS!

LIFE IN THE SUBURBS

 

LIFE IN THE SUBURBS,
IT ISN’T VERY PRETTY.
YOU GOT YOUR JUNKIES,
AND YOU GOT YOUR SNOBS!

IF THEY DON’T LIKE YOU FOR
WHO YOU ARE, THEY WILL JUST
TAUNT YOU DAY IN AND DAY OUT.
AND IF IT GETS BAD IT WILL HAUNT
YOU ALL YOUR LIFE!

I SHOULD KNOW.
I GREW UP IN THE SUBURBS.
THE SUBURBS OF PHOENIX, ARIZONA,
AND IT WASN’T VERY PRETTY!

TO THIS DAY, MY BRAIN IS
STILL SCREWED UP FROM THOSE SIX YEARS,
MAINLY JUST THE FIRST THREE.

I STILL DON’T GET MUCH RESPECT IN LIFE.
MOST PEOPLE JUST TRY AND IGNORE ME.
MOST PEOPLE JUST SEE ME AND THEY JUST WALK BY.
I FEEL I DON’T EVEN EXIST IN THE WORLD.
SOMEONE TAKE THESE TEARS AWAY FROM ME.
TAKE AWAY ALL THIS PAIN!

SOMETIMES I WISH I COULD
GO BACK THERE AND SHOW ALL
THEM FOOLS HOW I FEEL NOW.
BECAUSE OF ALL THEM BASTARDS’ ATTITUDES!

GROWING UP IN THE SUBURBS,
IT ISN’T VERY PRETTY.
YOU HAVE YOUR SNOBS AND
YOU HAVE YOUR JUNKIES!